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For Better Or Worse, Your Kids Need Both Of You

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 7:06 pm

Copyright (c) 2009 Lucille Uttermohlen

I had a case today that was very typical. Two divorced parents who generally got along found themselves in court because of their 15 year old daughter. She is a poor student, had some rather unsavory observations on her “My Space” page, and generally has shown herself to be a pain in the nether regions.

The father is one of those people who is so laid back, it is amazing he can stand up. He isn’t a bad guy, just a little distant and self involved. He works 5 nights a week, and is more interested in being a buddy to his kids than a parent. In short, if he gets the custody decision he wants, the daughter’s step-mother will be raising the girl.

The mother is from the old school. She believes her kids should do what they are told, and she monitors their computer and cell phone use. When the daughter lived with her, she had a strict curfew, and could not go out with her friends unless she told her mom where she was going, with whom, and when she’d be back. The daughter wasn’t allowed to date, and most of her social activities had to be approved by Mom beforehand. This may sound strict, but it will also sound familiar to those of us of a certain age.

Judgipoo was not happy with either parent. He felt the father was supporting the child in her disrespectful behavior. He didn’t reveal his deepest thoughts to the mother, but he wasn’t happy with the daughter’s grades when she lived with either parent. He was not interested in hearing the testimony of one of my witnesses to whom daughter dearest tried to sell drugs. In short, he came into court mad, wasn’t too happy when he listened to the parents, and was madder still when the hearing ended. All of the tropical plants in his courtroom were amply steamed, and the lawyer eating snakes went to bed tonight with full bellies.

The sad thing about this situation is that it could have been avoided. The parents apparently talked together about their kids and the behavior they expected from them earlier this year. The daughter announced that she would like to live with her father. The mother was willing to let her do it, thinking that a few weeks of not seeing Dad anymore than she would have during visitation would convince her that she may as well move home.

The daughter found that lack of supervision at Dad’s was a fun thing, and decided she wanted to stay. Throw in the step-sister with driving privileges, and the fact that no one made her do anything she didn’t want to, and it is easy to understand why she did not want to come back to her mother’s more regimented environment.

Dad refused to listen to Mom when she tried to tell him why she didn’t think things were working out. The girl admitted to Mom that she no longer had friends, and that she no longer engaged in the school activities she used to love. Dad testified that the only reason he had brought his custody case was that the “daughter wanted to live with him”. He didn’t know what grade she was in, nor did he know who her friends were, and that she had put her cell phone number on “My Space” where all the little perverts in the world could find it and call her for a nice sexy chat. If she’s lucky, she can have a date with a sex offender in 24 hours or less. Dad would be at work, so he needn’t be the wiser.

Both parents love the daughter. Dad just thinks he is being a good father because the girl relates to him like she does with the rest of the kids in her class. Mom thinks the kid ought to tow the line, and that she should be accountable for her time and attitudes towards people.

They are both right. Kids need to feel they can confide in their parents. There is a lot of confusing influences in today’s high schools, and a kid needs to be confident that the person who is responsible for their well being understands their feelings. However, they also need to be stopped from making choices that are not good for them, and Mom and Dad are the ones who have to guide them in this regard.

When people divorce, they need to forget their feelings towards each other when they are raising their kids. As hard and unpleasant as it can be, they should sit down and discuss what their kids are doing, and what actions they should be taking. Unfortunately, too many kids of divorce end up being parented by judges because the parents can’t agree between themselves what is best for their children. Not only does the court end up deciding where they will live, and how they will be supported, it also ends up having to decide whether the kids should have to go to reform school, or whether their drug use was a one time thing. This fact, more than anything else often results in a disconnect between society and the next generation. This is why divorcing couples should be very careful that living separately doesn’t mean they will no longer parent together.

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Houses Insurance Q&A

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 4:09 pm

* house fire 40 days ago*Do you necessitate a attorney to buy and sell beside a insurance company after a house fire?
should we just trust our company? does the case only close when we cash a check or can we tell them more or less missing things later? I just get out of the hospital and they have…

[House] insurance company problems, please assist?
After Hurricane Ike, there were severe damages to our house (basically put, it be an uninhabitable home), and after speaking to our insurance company and having an adjuster come out and assess the damages, the amount they are willing to provide is not even remotely on par beside the amount it will actually take…

16 year ripened son driving short insurance at dad’s house-What are primary custodians’ liability?
My husband and I have concerns about my son anyone allowed to drive with friends without person insured. I am primary custodian. His dad has custody of him on every 3rd weekend of the month and the first full week of each month. If my…

2 trees fell on my house, I don’t own any money to pay cheque to my insurance, What do I do?
2 trees feel on my house during a storm, they broke my backyard iron fence and are covering more than partially of the ground of my lawn. They are just lay there. They are not my trees, they belong…

A british citizen surrounded by america have house fire no insurance loses everything what can i do.carn`t even procure ID?
married to american ,need hip replcement since being here own prostate problems since being here,hip problem has lead to nerve damage on vanished hand from the neck,cannot lug federal aid so basicaly i`m screwed. live in montana ,i`m a builder from…

A drunk driver a moment ago hit my house end friday. What should I do, name driver insurance or my home insurance?
A drunk driver just hit my house last friday. No one get hurt but my sun room (patio) is all damaged. My famlity also get scared to stay in the bedroom since the coupé hit…

A drunk driver simply hit my house final friday. What should I do, name driver insurance or my home insurance?
A drunk driver just hit my house last friday. No one get hurt but my sun room (patio) is all damaged. My famlity also get scared to stay in the bedroom since the saloon hit some part…

A examine around house insurance?
I’ve just had a argument beside the mrs about house insurance.I’m fully covered and want to know that if my house had fire defacement due to a neighbour causing it through her own negligence in their house and she wasn’t insured would i still be capable of claim through my HBC house insurance.She says that we…

A pipe bust on the 3rd floor of my house, i own homeowners insurance, i be wondering if my insurer cover it?
This depends on the type of policy you have and what cause the pipe to burst. Almost all Homeowner’s policies will not cover damage from dampen unless the cause is sudden and accidental, or enter the house from…

About how much is home insurance contained by Dallas for a 3bed/2bth house? What is the nonspecific array?
I’m just trying to get a round give or take a few number for planning my home cost in the future. I meditate the median home cost is 130k. You can easily check your quotes surrounded by internet, for example here…

After a house fire and the insurance company?
my mother- in -laws house burnt down this week and she lost everything including her 13 yr outdated beloved cat, insurance people came for the contents record, how long does that take before they will present her a check for the amount so she can begin replaceing things she lost? Well, they…

After a house fire my insurance be cancelled when do i grasp reinstated?
when you jump find another company – this policy probably cancelled you after they paid out on your fire because now you are a greater risk (insurance companies are odd about that kind of stuff) Did they cover the loss? Was in that any suspicion of arson…

After have my house broken into and sports car stolen can I claim for dameges.I enjoy no insurance.?
The vehicle was recovered interstate at a cost of $800.00 to me .The car worth $27,000 is a right past its sell-by date and because it was off the road although registered for a clean engine replacement it was not covered by insurance.The…

After I Pay for Your Kids’ Insurance, Should I Pay For Your Beer, Your House, Your Cable TV, Your Suntan …
… lotion, the guy to mow your lawn, a new deck for your house, ….? Well, lately tell me what you want to pay for yourself. Anything? Maybe you should seize a second or third job. What entitles…

After my contract on my tentative house have be excepted. What is the subsequent step? Insurance? Appraisal? Inspection?
WE are not using an agent, it is a for sale by owner… Your best bet is to hire a real estate attorney to guide you through the process and clear sure you don’t get yourself into a big mess. …

Am I covered beneath my uncle’s insurance policy if he lives near us within my parent’s house?
If you live in the same residence and if he added you to his policy as another driver, later you will be covered for whatever he opted for you. Regardless of his residence, the policy itself determines who is covered. Some insurance…

Am I paying my house insurance twice?!?!?
I just purchased my first house in July 08 and I am set up on a escrow details. I have allstate insurance, but I am totally confused about what the escrow reason pays. I thought it pays for my pmi, city taxes, and homeowners insurance. Is that wrong? Allstate sends me a bill online…

Am i supposed to hold any form of insurance when renting a house?
Yes, yes, yes! You need to protect not only your personal products; the liability insurance protection that comes with a tenant’s policy is very esteemed. My daughter watched as an apt. in her complex caught fire, later spread to four other units. She at…

An army humvee run over bushes surrounded by front of my house, do i concordat near the section or the drivers insurance company?
I’m talking with the company 1SG immediately and I was wondering if I should even be talking beside him at all. I’m thinking that I should contact the driver and go through his insurance company but since…

An insurance agent be only just at my house to standard my property. We be looking to unsystematic companies?
She unlatched the gate to the back patio to get in. When she departed, she did not re latch the gate. My husband got home at 5:30 and tolerate our dog Patches out as he has done for the last 9 1/2…

Anyone driving your vehicle is covered below your insurance as long as they don’t live within your house.?
This is per my insurance company. True, with your authorization. As long they are listed on you r policy, they are insured to drive your car. You can search out it on the net for some additional information. Try to call round…

Anyone driving your vehicle is covered lower than your insurance as long as they don’t live within your house.?
This is per my insurance company. If that’s what the insurance company told you why are you asking a question? Anyone who lives in your household and have a valid drivers license should be listed as a driver on the policy….

Anyone else be aware of it’s the meterologist shortcoming that Florida is losing house insurance from so heaps companies?
In 2004 Florida was hit by numerous hurricanes that caused a great deal of problems. Since then all I keep hold of hearing is how the meteorologist believe this is going to be even worse than that each year. They…

Anyone have any connections beside house fire and homeowners insurance?
daughters home burned down the day before her nuptials.how long does it take to get the checks I wish I could grant you an exact amount of time, but, I can’t. Much depends on the who, what, when, where, why and how regarding the facts of the fire. …

Anyone know anything almost house insurance?
i have a leak from apipe which have damaged my downstairs neighbours. i have be told that i am liable for the damage. But is it true that they need to foot for the damage claim it through their own insurance who in turn rest monies from mine? if you live surrounded by…

Approximately how much is homeowners insurance for 140,000 house near everything else common?
I’m looking to purchase my first house and I was just wondering how much homewoners insurance might cost. I know alarm systems and smoke detectors etc. evolution the cost, but I was just wanting to achieve a ballpark figure. Thanks!! I reimburse about $700/yr. for…

Are here websites just about tree/branch & Insurance Co precedents for covering spot on ruin to house situations
No. Sorry. And the reason for that, is to avoid liability issues. Every company can use it’s own forms, and they are ALSO state specific. Source(s): agent, 21+ years

Are insurance claims on a house public information?
If I am looking for a home, are there any records that can my legitimate estate agent check to determine if any type of insurance claims were made on the house? For example, roof replacement, water harm, fire, other structural. No, but…

Are sheds covered on house insurance if they are destabilized surrounded by a storm?
My insurance states that only the contents are covered, but my friend reckons that she will receive a payout if her shed is demolished in a storm. Does anyone else have this covered on their insurance, if so, who are you insured near?? If you phone…

Are stolen items on house insurance?
Today I had my handbag stolen with my ipod and camera inside. I own reported it to the police, but do you get stolen items, (or the money equivalents) on your house insurance? How much do you chew over your claim total will be? If it is less than $2,000, I would highly recommend you…

More Houses Insurance quesions please visit : InsuranceQuotesFAQ.com

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should i let my 13 year old daughter drink monster energy drink?

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 4:07 pm

as on the side of the can not recomended for children?

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My Favourite Authors of the World

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 2:07 pm

RABINDRANATH TAGORE

My Favourite Author

The first time when I had sung the National Anthem composed by Rabindranath Tagore, the rhythm and the tune touched my heart and magnified the love for Bangladesh. I started reading his short stories and poems, which he created for children gave me real pleasure. His power of simplification and showing the beauty of truth within little things for extensive exemplification for which my inquisitiveness feelings make him my favourite author.

A short account of the author

The Tagore’s were of a cultured and wealthy family. Rabindranath Tagore was born in 7th May 1861 and died in 7th August 1941. His father, Devendranath, was one of the leaders of the Brahma Samaj. The poet’s early life was spent in an atmosphere of religion and arts, literature, music and paintings. As an author, the trend of his life was early contemplated. He was brought up and taught on three languages- Sanskrit, Bengali and English.

Tagore’s literary life outspread over sixty years, and he reminds one of Victor Hugo in the copiousness and variety of his work: over one thousand poems; nearly two dozen plays and play-lets; eight novels; eight or more volumes of short stories; more than two thousands songs, of which he wrote both the words and the music; and a mass of prose on literary, social, religious, political, and other topics. In addition to his English translations of some of his literary works; his paintings; his travels and lecture-tours in Asia, America, and Europe; and his activities as an educationist, as a social and religious reformer, and as a politician- and there we have, judged by quantity alone, the life work of a Nipple. Suffice it to say that his genius was no more than the capacity for taking infinite pains; but to note the element of steel and concrete that went to his making, and thus to dispose of the legend, that has grown in some quarters in recent years, of Tagore the pale-lily poet of ladies’ table.

In 1901 he founded his school, the Santiniketan, at Bolpur as a protest against the existing evil system of education. The school was a great success and transfigured Viswabharati. On revisiting England in 1911 he brought with him the English Gitanjali, and it’s publication in 1912 and the award of the Nobel Prize for literature the following year made him world-famous. This was the first award of that prize to an Asiatic. The rest of Tagore’s life was spent at Santiniketan, except for several travels and lecture-tours in which he carried his message of human unity to all the important countries of Asia, America and Europe.
Tagore was a proud and ardent patriot. His most intense period of political activity was in the years following 1905, when the agitation against the partition of Bengal was at its highest speed. He renounced his knighthood in 1919 as protest against the Amritsar affair in a letter to the Viceroy, which is among the great documents of freedom. His patriotic poems and songs, particularly the latter, have passed into the common heritage of his country; the song “Bharata-bhagya-vidata” is now sung all over India and “Amar sonar Bangla” in Bangladesh as the national anthem. In this respect I would like to discuss a few of his books which have stirred my heart towards having an unbounded pleasure of spiritual as well as real cultural life.

HOIMONTI

It is a remarkable short story where Tagore has tried to reflect a contrast between the two families comprising of conservatism and modernism. Hoimonti was educated in modern system of education where her father had influenced her by proper knowledge, culture, heritage and means to retaliate the real life situation. But as ill luck would have it, she was married with Opu, a son of conservative family. This family believed in superstitions and social customs. Opu’s father and mother had prejudice, which would influence Hoimonti tremendously. In the last Hoimonti was faded and her father-in-law was looking for another bride for his son.

BOLAI

This story is about a boy who doesn’t have a mother and was brought up by his aunt. He developed the character, which is different from his age group. He has an uncommon fondness towards the plants and trees. Bolai would not tolerate if anybody would weed out any plants and trees. He thought that every plant has a unique life, which is unknown to everybody. He showed all his love and sympathy even for the tree which grew in an unsuitable place. In the last his most favourite tree was cut down when his father took to Shimla for higher studies. Bolai’s aunt was shocked at the demolition of the tree, which she thought was the personification of Bolai.

SHESHER KABITA

It is a famous novel created by Tagore. The actress of the story is Labonno and the actor is Amit. The contrast and love affairs of them have been reflected in a significant manner. The book has the greatest literary value in the world.

KABULIWALA

The main characters of this story are a girl named Mini and Rahmat the Kabuliwala. Kabuliwala is from Afghanistan; he sells things from door to door. Once she was introduced to Mini, the talkative girl who was five years old. The man has left his daughter who is of Mini’s age back home. Mini and Kabuliwala developed a very good friendship. Kabuliwala used to bring dry fruits for Mini as present and showed the patience of listening to Mini. They used to tease each other about “going to in-laws house”. For some reason the man has to go to prison for eight years. After coming from jail he wanted to meet Mini. But, at that time Mini’s marriage ceremony was going on. In the past eight years she has forgotten her friend
Kabuliwala. She was not friendly like her childhood and was feeling shy seeing him. Kabuliwala could feel the distance the time has passed between them and his daughter.

POSTMASTER

It is a short story by Rabindranath regarding a postmaster. The postmaster was transferred to a village post office of India. Here he met a girl named Ratan with whom he would always continue conversation hours after hours. One day the postmaster fell ill, Ratan has looked after him and in this way a close relationship was developed between them. When the postmaster was transferred to the town again the girl became shocked and she asked him to take her with him but the postmaster was not in a position to take her. Rattan lived with the sheer pain of the lovely memory; she had spent with the postmaster.

I like his books

I like Rabindranath’s book because I come to learn many things about the land, people and nature. We learn the problems, religion, culture and heritage of Bengali life. His books sometimes really create thrill, intuition and excitement for the readers by reflecting the social conflicts and contrast between conservative and modern educated people. Furthermore, his poetry ingrained in common life has been vividly contemplated in a significant manner , which stir my heart to a great extent.

WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
God has created lots of peoples in the universe. Different peoples have different creativity but such a man who has got thousands of creativities in one brain is really something. He is by born talented. The time I heard that there was a person like I was curious to know about him. After knowing about him he became my favourite.
A short account of the Author
William Shakespeare was a shining star in the sky of English literature that had created a history by sorting out some problems of human beings and tried to solve them. He was the greatest dramatist and poet in the world. He led his life very simply, cleanly and controlled which were the best fascinations at that time. He was born in 1564 in Startford in England in the village of Port Avon. From his childhood, he was sincere and mild-hearted. He was intelligent and uncommon genius. He had written a number of tragedy drama and romantic comedy. He had had the recognition of the world as a world-class author, which stirs the mind of the readers for all time in the history. He died in 1616. .
MACBETH
In this book, there is no doubt that Macbeth is a tragic hero. The flow, which brings about his downfall, is ambition. The evil in him is symbolized by ambition and ambition was one of the main vices of the devil that brought about a mischievous destruction in the character of Macbeth where he had become boosted by being enterprises by the supernatural sprits. Shakespeare has treated ambition in this context as a pride, jealous and rebellion against the will of God. Macbeth had killed his just king for pelf and power and ultimately he inflicted the realms of frustration and the abuses of the people who were the silent evidences of his evil doings.

YOU LIKE IT
It is one of the Shakespeare’s finest comedies which has occupied a great space of pleasure, romanticism and the gist of the contrast between the two groups of the people who are the citizens of two different strategies of life. One seeks pleasure in midst of luxurious life and the other is accustomed to live in the forest of Arden where peace and tranquility of love under the Greenwood tree is very much based on illuminating conflagration. This play gives us plenty of gaiety, mirth and joyousness of romanticism. It keeps the readers happy and laughing most of the time because of the abundance in it of wit and humor. As you like it represents a number of characters that are the center point of the source of wit and humor. The Romantic Rosalind, Celia, Touchstone and cynical Jacques are the characters of the play who deal with wit and humor.
JULIUS CAESAR
It is a tragedy where the consequence of over ambitious man has been vividly envisaged. Caesar was a just ruler who was dedicated for the well beings of the people. Brutus, one of the courteous of Caesar being jealous had killed Caesar, which inflicted dangerous misfortune of Brutus.
MERCHANTS OF VENICE
It is a story about two merchants in Venice who are very much influential personalities in respect of business and wealth. The two persons were Antonio and Shylock. Bassanio was the friend of Antonio. He needed money in order to impress the beauty of Portia who was famous for her intelligence and ready wit. On behalf of Bassanio, he borrowed money from Shylock on the basis of a strange bond. The bond envisages that in case of failure in making repayment within the stipulated time, Shylock would cut one pound flesh from any part of Antonio’s body. In the last part of the story, the fatal consequences of Shylock have been vividly described.

HAMLET

It is a story of tragedy where Hamlet was tormented with mental thoughts about the conflicts regarding his father’s death. He came to learn by the miracle message by his father’s ghost spirit. His mother had married with his uncle who had actually killed his father. By dint of his indomitable will and hardihood, he had revenged upon them.

I Like His Books

The way Shakespeare writes his plays and books is unparalleled. His style of writing is totally different from others. As he is always exceptional to me and I have read many of his books so I should rather say that he is a great author.

FYODOR MIKHAILOVICH DOSTOYEVSKY

My Favourite Author

Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoyevsky is my favourite author. I like him because to me, no 19th-century author had greater psychological insight or philosophical depth or as systematically plumbed the mysteries of the human soul in the field of human Psychic and spiritualistic ideology of real life phenomena.

A short Account of the Author

The Russian novelist Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoyevsky, b. Nov. 11 (NS), 1821, d. Feb. 9 (NS), 1881, stands at the very summit of Russian literature and is considered by many to have brought the Western novel to the peak of its possibilities. Sigmund Freud, for one, considered the treatment of patricide in The BROTHERS KARAMAZOV the equal of that of Shakespeare in Hamlet

The son of a Moscow military doctor who was murdered by his serfs, Dostoyevsky grew up in materially comfortable but psychologically damaging circumstances. After finishing a military engineering education in 1843, he soon turned to literature.

• BROTHERS KAMRAMAZOV

The Brothers Karamazov (1879-80; Eng. trans., 1927) is DOSTOYEVSKY’s last work and greatest novel. In it, Dostoyevsky presents four Karamazov Brothers—the passionate Dimitri, the intellectual Ivan, the mystical Alyson, and the misanthropic Smerdayakov.e dramatizes their fate, their relationship with their father, and the guilt they suffer because of his murder. The novel concerns with everything that Dostoyevsky struggled with during lifetime: faith and doubt, love of authority and hatred of it, sensuality abstinence, hatred of the human race and the love of it.

Crime and Punishment

Crime and Punishment (1866), is a psychological masterpiece by the Russian novelist Fyodor DOSTOYEVSKY, mixes such contemporary 19th-century themes as the anonymous, alienating power of society with the universal problems of crime, guilt, and redemption. Raskolnikov, an impoverished student in Saint Petersburg, kills and robs a grasping old woman pawnbroker, but his ostensible motives serve merely to introduce the author’s exploration of the nature of justice and truth. Raskolnikov ultimately decides to accept punishment through his love for the young prostitute Sonya, whose life is one of suffering and remorse.

Notes from the underground

The Underground (1864), a powerful work that is considered the philosophical testament of existentialism as well as the prologue to DOSTOYEVSKY’s great tragic novels. The Underground Man is a cynical denizen of St. Petersburg, alienated from his surroundings and his fellow man, who nevertheless poses a powerful challenge to the impersonal forces of rationalism, progress, and social engineering. He is an intransigent champion of free will.

The Idiot

The Idiot (1869; Eng.trans.,1913) portrays a morally blameless man, Prince ,whose Mishkin, whose innocent and simple nature and epileptic seizures cause him to be taken from a certain. His Christ like qualities, far from influencing those about him, is to be utterly incongruous in a sinful world. Nastasya Filipovna, who has been cruelly treated by a former lover, is attracted both to Mishkin and the evil Rogozin, and is unable to commit herself to either. When Rogozhjn kills her, Miskin’s allows him to be an unwitting accomplice in the murder.

The Possessed

DOSTOYEVSKY’s next novel, Besy (1872; The Possessed), earned him the permanent hatred of the radicals. Often regarded as the most brilliant political novel ever written, it interweaves two plots. One concerns Nikolay Stavrogin, a man with a void at the centre of his being. In his younger years Stavrogin, in a futile quest for meaning, had embraced and cast off a string of ideologies, each of which has been adopted by different intellectuals mesmerized by Stavrogin’s personality. Shatov has become a Slavophile who, like Dostoyevsky himself, believes in the “God-bearing” Russian people. Existentialist critics (especially Albert Camus) became fascinated with Kirillov, who adopts a series of contradictory philosophical justifications for suicide. Most famously, Kirillov argues that only an utterly gratuitous act of self-destruction can prove that a person is free because such an act cannot be explained by any kind of self-interest and therefore violates all psychological laws. By killing himself without reason, Kirillov hopes to become the “man-god” and so provide an example for human freedom in a world that has denied Christ (the God-man).

I Like His Books

Since his death Dostoyevsky’s fame has continued to grow. None speaks more immediately to the mood and tone of the present century. In fact, it might be said that Western civilization in the second half of the 20th century has become “Dostoyevskian.”

CHARLES DICKENS

My Favourite Author

D
ickens wide array of touching characters emphasizes the virtues of sacrifice, comprise, charity, and loyalty. the feelings for the poor, which he expresses in his stories, made me one of his fan and he became my favourite author.

Brief Account of the author

Charles Dickens was born in 1812 and is still a popular English novelist. He was born to John & Elizabeth Dickens in a small terraced house at 1-mile End terrace, Land port, Port Sea on 7th February
1872. The house is now a museum & houses, furniture of the and the couch on which he died.

At the age of 5, his family moved to Chadman in Kent & then 5 years later to Camden
in London. In 1824,when his father was imprisoned for debt, he was sent to work at a Warren’ Blacking factory at Hunger ford market.

This was a very unhappy period in his life and when his father was released he attended day school. Three years after he commended work as a solicitor’s clerk, subsequently becoming a freelance reporter at Doctor’s Commons Courts. On 2nd April 1836, he married Catherine Hogarth the daughter
of his friend. He died in 1870. Now I will describe some of his literary work in short.

DESCRIBING SOME STORIES OF CHARLES DICKENS

DAVID COPPERFIELD

This is also a story of a contrast and Comedy of social conflicts. The author has tried to bring a strategy of life where there is joy, sorrows and happiness. The actors and the actress have met crisis and they have suffered a lot to a great extent. The lifestyles and monotonous pictures of David Copperfield have been discussed. The commitment met by David Copperfield was not true to his friend. Their friends have not sociably accepted his proposal to make wits and humor. For this he was dispersed and deviated from his friend’s circle and parents, which led his life miserable.

THE TALE OF TWO CITIES

This story has been written in the background of French revolution. In every time, the crisis has been created and the fatal consequences have been vividly reflected. The main characters of the story are : Dr. Mannette, Sydney Cartoon, Luchy and Mr. Darnay. In this story, Ever Mondes’ brother who willingly tormented the happy life of Dr. Mannette and have victimized Dr. Manette to conspiracy. Dr. Mannette was living peacefully in Paris with his practice. Once upon a time one evermond brother informed him that a girl was lying like dead in a certain place. Dr. Mannette recently went there and found that evermond brothers had recently disgraced the girl and in order to save her a boy came forward to rescue her but he was also shoot dead. Dr. Mannette submitted a detail report to the government against the evermond brothers. But the case actually went against Dr. Mannette. On a trial of a judgement Dr. Mannette was sentenced imprisonment for long fifteen years.

HARD TIMES

The story is based on the family affairs of a businessman and his friends. Here the author has created crisis and has created o reflect their motives of lively-beings expansively. Mr. Bansberry and his friends were the main subject of the story. He married with a girl who did not agree in their affairs. But she agreed to marry to provide her brother in the workshop of Mr. Bansburry. She had revenged at last against her husband by making his workshop burnt by her brother and made his bank robbery. Due to the fact, it was a consequence of her conspiracy of long days against Mr. Bansburry.

OLIVER TWIST

It is the story of a young orphan boy whose life sketch has been reflected as the life of poverty and depression under nonchalance, remorse and dilapidated environment in England in the 1830’s. The story envisages the evil of the poor family of the time and the corruption of the people who were usually accustomed to work there. It also shows the depths of London’s crime with an emphasis on petty robbery and pick pocketing. The main evil character of the novel, Fagin, also referred to as “The Jew” is characterized as a money pincher with no true affections. His main goals are to exploit the people around him so he can better his station and strengthen his power. Oliver, on the other hand, is the complete opposite. Oliver represents all that is good in the society. He abhors the thought of stealing, violence, or mistreatment of any sort. The hate that Monks feels for Oliver and the greed he feels towards his inheritance eventually destroys him. The revenge that Sikes inflicts on Nancy drives him almost insane and eventually too accidental suicide.

I like his books

In his every novel, Charles Dickens has created crisis and described the consequences of his actors and actresses. I like this author’s books because he had created history in his novels and in the light of the history, the background of the stories has been highlighted as a process of resurrection of human beings.

SIR FRANCHISE BACON

My Favourite Author

Bacon, in the sense that his thirst for knowledge is unquestionable. He was interested in every branches of knowledge. He was not only a mere essayist but also a pioneer of science. He was a man of towering and powerful observation and he used this gift for the study of man. He is clearly seen in his essays, sometimes as a teacher, sometimes as a philosopher, and moralist. For all these reasons I like him a lot.

Brief Account of the Author

Sir Franchise Bacon is acclaimed as the father of English Essays and the greatest prose- Wright of the Jachobean period. His essays are treasure house of worldly wisdom. They cover a very wide range and variety and they certainly provide abundant proof of the vast experience and worldly wisdom of man who wrote them.

Describing Some Stories of Bacon in Short

• OF MARRIAGE AND SINGLE LIFE

• OF TRUTH

• OF FRIENDSHIP

• OF STUDIES

• OF PARENTS AND CHILDREN

• OF MARRIAGE AND SINGLE LIFE

This is a popular essay of Bacon. It deals with some of the most common experience of human life. Here Bacon takes a balanced view of the married and single life upon their merits and demerits of real life situation. Bacon says that unmarried man can sacrifice themselves for the cause of public affairs like equality and liberty of the country. Bacon expresses his wisdom with wit when he says that chaste women are often proud and forward as presuming upon in the merit of their chastity.

OF FRIENDSHIP

In this essay Bacon says that friendship is treasure. If a man has a friend, he can help him in weal and woe. According to him, a true friend may be a partner of joys, sorrows and happiness and he can get consolation from his friend.

OF TRUTH

It this essay we find that he has shown the readers a loves of truth. He says that a man’s mind should turn upon the poles of truth. Bacon tells about the creation of light reason, which is scientifically based on truth. He says that the first creation of God, in the works of the days, was the light of the sense, the last was the light of the reason and his Sabbath work, ever since, is the illustration of his sprit of his spirit with life because it can play havoc with his fortune.

OF STUDIES

He points out through generalization that we should study. If we spend much time for studies over theoretical aspects instead of applied aspects then we encouraged sloth. Over much study leads us to show our pedant city and boosting too much study make us or till badly upon us, he provides us with prescriptions as to how we should study. He says that some books are red in parts, some entirely, some curiously, some carefully and some summarily.

OF PARENTS AND CHILDREN

Bacon says that during childhood and youth one may get much liberty and he urges parents to chexpose the vacation and coarse while their children, will be made otherwise they will take the shelter of nakedness. According to him there are two types of learning, one is Pedagoggy which is Children learning what is rendered by the parents and his surroundings and the other is Andragoggy which is adult learning what is rendered in the form of guidance and control where nobody can teach the adult.

I Like His Books

I like his essays not only because they are gripping plots, but also they bring the hidden truth of our practical life into the limelight.

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How do I get my daughter to drink regular milk from a sippy cup without throwing up or gagging?

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 2:07 pm

She is 14 months and she had no problem drinking regular milk at 12 months when she stopped drinking her formula. I starting giving her a sippy cup at 6 mons. She will drink juice and water from it. I introduce a cup to her early so “I thought” she would have no problem transforming her from a bottle to a cup when the time comes. But, she hates it so much and start crying and end up throw up and gagging. Please Help me and give me some tips on my email. librascale928@yahoo.com

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Will alcoholic husband get daughter?

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 2:07 pm

My best friend and her husband are about to go through a nasty divorce. In our state, you HAVE to have a lawyer for a divorce and custody, unless you go to the courthouse and file together. He has no job, he is an alcoholic, he is bi-polar, and he’s extremely violent.
He DID stop drinking for about a month and half, but three days ago, one of his friends bought him a case or two of beer. He’s been drinking since. She will be staying with me when she comes back up here tomorrow, along with their two year old daughter.
He says that he will get full custody of their daughter. She is not an unfit mother and in fact is solely responsible for the kid’s welfare, since all he does all day–and I’m not exaggerating–is drink and play Eleven on his computer. (He lives directly above me.) He is not actively searching for a job (his car never moves).
Will he get full cusody of his daughter? Or should my friend file for full custody based on the grounds that he is an unfit parent?
In December he plead guilty to an assault and harrassment charge for assaulting his wife in November. He’s always saying stuff to me like how he could beat my you-know-what, and just last night, he said he would break my arm if I didn’t stop joking around. I told him “you could try”. I am not afraid of him, he cannot hurt me.

My friend does not want to take their daughter away from him, but she is afraid of what he will–or won’t do–if he were to have full custody.
Right now, my friend has nowhere else to go. She has no one to live with and she can’t afford aplace on her own.

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How do i get my step daughter to respect me?

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 2:07 pm

Hi i am 21 soon to be 22 years old i have a son who is two years old named Vincent and a 12 year old step daughter named nicole. I met my husband at an Italian resturant last year and we have been married now for 6 months. He is 27 years old and the love of my life dispite the age difference.I met his daughter only once a month before the wedding and she is now living with us. Her mother was killed by a drunk driver at 6 yrs and her grandparents(moms side) took care of her after that but were getting to old one needed extra care. I recently graduated from college and in 4 months will be working for an insurance company.His daughter can not stand me at all i have tried being her friend driving her to movies so she can be with friends ect. nothing works, she says i am embarrassing and hates when i drive her to school. I am willing to try anything?Why is she embarrassed of me?
also i am nervous i have to go too back to school night with her since her dad cant make it.

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A Week in the Life of the Single Working Mother

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 1:24 pm

A Week in the Life of the Single, Working Mother

 

“It’s ok,” you think. “Nothing to worry about, really!”  I mean who doesn’t occasionally put their panties on inside out?  It can happen! The cottage is relatively dark in the morning and the bathroom has no light in it, so even if you went to the toilet you wouldn’t have noticed. No problem there. But then you go to the bathroom at work for the umpteenth time in the morning (you suffer from a weak bladder) and only then do you notice, staring back at you from the mirror,  a moron who is wearing two different types of earrings! Not two similar earrings, that may be understandable, but two totally different decorations. “Are those warning bells?” I think, listening intently.  “Or is that just the sound of me losing my mind”. I stride back into the office, laughing – you must do this in these situations -  and tell everyone the story. It’s funny, really, I mean, who doesn’t occasionally put two different earrings in their lobes?

 

All might have been well if I hadn’t remembered the keys! “Try to forget the key story!” I tell myself.  But no, a nagging imp-like, pest of a voice insists that I remember the keys. So, warily I cast my mind back to this morning’s debacle.  On leaving the cottage this morning, I absolutely know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I looked at the keys on their hook. I removed them from said hook and walked up to my car with three of my four children. Imagine my frustration and absolute impatience (I’m very impatient with ineptitude), when I couldn’t find the keys. This followed having to squeeze into my car (it was parked too close to my brother’s car), loaded with bags, trying to balance on my high heels that kept sinking into the soft earth. The keys! I just could’nt find the blasted things! We all looked, all four of us, while I muttered all the while that I definitely took them off the hook. Jarred, my nineteen year old, decided, very quietly, not to believe me, and wandered off to the cottage. He reappeared shortly after, keys in hand. Had I dropped them on the way? Did I put them down after picking them up? No, nothing that simple. I was flabbergasted to discover that they were still, in fact, hanging on the hook. Those damned fairies. Jarred knew better than to comment.

 

 My doctor says I’m stressed. My therapist says “Duh”! So, I decided that I would look at a week in my life and try to discover if I am indeed stressed, tired, overworked and hence abnormally distracted!

 

A week! How do you determine a week? My life seems to run from one chaotic moment to the next, forming hours, days, weeks and years. My absent-mindedness began on a Friday so I decided to capture my week beginning with the previous Sunday.

 

This week began relatively normally on Sunday evening when my eleven year old realized that he hadn’t completed his project that had been due for the previous Thursday. Nothing too complicated, just a moving greeting card! No need to panic, especially as he also had to look for every letter of the alphabet (in differing fonts and sizes), and stick them onto a piece of paper.  Ok, so I panic a little! Who wouldn’t?  Try finding a “Q” or a “J”. The card is cut out, his cricket players look like aliens and the family is in fits of laughter while my seven year old daughter draws something of a Rembrandt version of his picture (she is very bright). He doesn’t mind, just shrugs and continues to be glued to the TV, while I bellow, “Homework! Vincent, your homework!”

This situation could, in itself, be bearable but for that fact that it is happening at 6.30pm. This is the beginning of hell night. It is bath time accompanied by more bellows, “Get in the bath! Vincent, bath water! Katie, GET IN THE BATH!” It is school lunch time, but more on that later. It is uniform preparation time and goodness knows what else. There is always something of great significance that pops up out of nowhere to cause chaos and disorder.  There is also supper. After a huge lunch of prawns and rice the little angels are hungry. I’m not hungry! So I throw chicken pieces, covered with tinned tomatoes into the oven and put on a pot of rice.  I am functioning on three planes. My friend is there for a visit with biscuits, dips and wine – very sophisticated, my kids are between nakedness and pyjamas – very bohemian, my food is slowly overcooking and I am trying to engineer a moving cricket bat that will hit a ball across a card. As I’m sure I’ve mentioned, there is absolutely no need to panic – much! The kids end up going to bed halfway through the E-TV movie which, of course, is too late! I am a failure of a mother!

 

By 9.30pm, school uniforms are ready, hanging over chairs but sandwiches must be made. I usually make amazing lunches but tonight there is no bread. If there was bread there would be no filling. I am, however, supermom, and I have a plan! Tuckshop! Godsend! Tomorrow I will make that new sandwich filling : sweet corn, tuna and mayonnaise. The kids are already moaning about that one. I tell them that they have to broaden their horizons! Then I get “make us an extra sandwich, in case we don’t like that one”. My kids, the connoisseurs! Tuna – not good enough.  Ham – only fine alone, no mayonnaise or, for Katie and Jarred, with mustard. Vince wants salami, no mayonnaise. I tried pilchards and cucumber. My little ones tried to be kind saying,  “Mom, we didn’t really like the lunch today”. Jarred said it was wonderful but he that he couldn’t take it to Varsity anymore because : “It STINKS!” How subtle! One day they love chocolate spread, the next they don’t. One of them, can’t remember which, hates cheese spread but my twenty-two year old could live on it.  One loves peanut butter, the other shudders at the thought. The only thing I seem to get spot on are the chocolates and sweets that I provide.  Jarred won’t eat those though! He’s trying to diet!

 

Monday morning dawns and I have to drag myself out of bed at 6.30 after I’ve changed the alarm setting twice. I realize that I’m playing with fire as Jarred must be at University by eight and we have to drop the little ones off first. He will be furious if he realizes how late we got up. Little ones don uniforms (this takes about half an hour – no idea why), with me shouting about how they should stop dawdling and have breakfast. Needless to say, they suck down their cocoa pops while big brother rants about how late he’s going to be. I decide that I can’t possible make it to work. My neck is in agony, I am exhausted and constipated and signs of haemorrhoids are beginning to emerge.  My boss will spontaneously combust as she has told me that today I am getting a written warning for a mistake made on Friday.  Could my physical symptoms be psychosomatic or am I merely skirting the threshold of severe and irreversible stress? I phone the office, make excuses to my colleague (it’s easier) and go to bed, after telephoning the doctor to make an appointment for my daughter and myself. Katie has been getting waves of extreme tiredness and I’m really worried. It’s never anything curable, when it’s your child, is it? The mind of a mother is a very frightening place sometimes.

Monday wears on. I fetch Katie and her friend from school at 1.00pm. We go home, relax a bit, read and I smoke hubbly bubbly, (it relaxes me, ok!). She has raided my purse because she wants a pie for lunch. I have no money save R40 in the car for petrol! Jarred has my card. Three fifteen p.m. and it’s time to fetch Vincent from cricket (back to the school I left  two hours previously). I give in and buy two pies and put twenty rand petrol into my car. We pick up Vincent, nearly get hit by a stray cricket ball and head off to the doctor for our 4.00pm appointment. The fun has just begun! Kaitlyn must have a blood test. Have you ever tried to hold down a ten foot, rabid, thrashing and peculiarly terrified Anaconda? I’m sure not but I think it would be a breeze!  It would certainly be easier than holding down a terrified, stubborn, bucking bronco of a seven year old. I won’t go into detail – it’s far too traumatic – but it played out like a scene from a Tarantino movie.  Three adults (all in various phases of shock) holding down a tiny child whilst one of the adults sticks a 10cm thick, 1 metre long needle into her arm and  proceeds to suck all the blood from her body. She, all the while, screaming “Mommy! Mommy! Please!”.  I tell you, if you have never felt like a heel before and have an odd desire to do so, I fully recommend this as the way to go about it.

 

In the midst of the screaming chaos, Jarred phones. “You can fetch me now”, he says nonchalantly. The little pulsing blood vessel in my temple seems to explode as I explain as calmly as possible, why he has to wait. Meanwhile, Vincent has disappeared to the toilet in the front of the doctor’s rooms. He does not emerge until the screaming, from the far end of the building has subsided! Once the torture is over, she is shaken but laughs as I joke about how strong she is and how hard she can kick. She is not the only one trembling. The doctor grins nervously at me saying that he knows it seems barbaric, but honestly, it has to be done. Then he rushes from the room. The nurse just fumbles for words and I sit there hugging my daughter until my heart decides to return to my chest.

 

It is now five o’clock and Jarred is waiting at the University in Parktown. I rush off, still shaken but trying to play it down and make jokes. Katie sits unusually quietly on the back seat. I hardly notice the hellish traffic, I can handle anything after the past hour. We get to Jarred and he, very foolishly, says : “Why do you make appointments at five when you know you’re fetching me?” Is it really necessary to explain or will my feral death stare suffice. It does! Katie revives and excitedly tells Jarred about her nightmare experience. In record time it becomes an adventure and by Wednesday I will be relieved to know that my baby is doing well and that she probably just has worms.

 

In the blur that is my life I make supper, get the children bathed, eat, sort out homework, uniforms and sandwiches. The ex-husband telephones the children and says something inane to Katie like : “If you go to bed early you won’t be so tired and need blood tests.” Although I contemplate smashing the cell phone against the wall, I realize that it is mine and so I pour myself another glass of wine! The quiet breathing of my sleeping children, the studious attitude of my middle son, and the comings and goings of my eldest make it all worthwhile – most of the time! Thank God Monday is over.

 

Tuesday begins much the same way with me pulling my comatose body from the sleeper couch (don’t ask). Today there is a cricket match for Vincent (he finishes at about 5.00), and netball and  P.E. for Katie. I am organized. All is well. The usual shouting routine ensues in a fast-forward blur and I appear, miraculously, at work. I am angry and defensive due to the fact that when my friend called for me at work on Monday, my boss told him that I was scared to come to work. Scared? Of work? I’m waiting for blood test results, if you really want to know what fear is! I am called into the “big boss’s” office. I am given the poor work performance lecture and am prepared to receive my letter of warning. I decide to completely ignore my boss – dislike her right now – pull myself together and try even harder at work.  I am so happy when my friend calls and says that I don’t have to do lift scheme and that Kate can play with “Scarlie” today. A breather!  Jarred, however, finishes early so I have to take him home and come back to work. What is it they say about no rest?

 

After work I fetch Katie from Scarlet (where she did her homework – whoopee) and Vincent from cricket.  I finally get the kids into the bath while I cook supper in the house (again, don’t ask).  It’s a rather difficult task as I have to keep running back to the cottage for the ingredients that I have forgotten.  I try to do this really quietly because if the bathing darlings hear me, I am yelled for. This usually happens when I’ve made it into the cottage undetected and am halfway back to the house, thinking how cleverly I have eluded them. The word, “MOM”, uttered very loudly, causes me to stop dead in my tracks. Like a secret agent I attempt to melt into my surroundings. I become very quiet, I tip-toe up the stairs and into the kitchen. Made it! They soon forget that they have called me and I am congratulating myself when a raucous cacophony emerges from the bathroom and the air is filled with shouting and wailing.

“Jarred!” I scream, “For goodness sake, sort them out!” 

They are fearful of him until he turns his back and then Katie begins to sob and gesticulate hysterically. It appears that Vincent has ‘accidentally’ wee’d in the bath and then, just as ‘accidentally’, has splashed all the wee-filled water all over her.  All fear of terminal illnesses vacate my mind as I threaten to drown the children in the bath. My yells of “GET OUT! PUT NEW WATER IN,” to Vincent are heard blocks away while Katie adamantly refuses to get back in the bath with him and wanders around sopping wet and wrapped in a towel.

 

I somehow make it through the evening, tidying my cottage, packing my mom’s dishwasher with my dishes and watching that Vincent completes his homework. All memory of long division has long since been erased and I battle to help him with his maths homework.  I quickly pack Katie’s ballet  clothes – where the hell are those character shoes – and convince her that, because the shoes are too small,  I will get her new ones.

“Feel where my toe is,” she says convincingly to me.

Vincent has P.E tomorrow, so does Katie, but he refuses to wear a Speedo and so I must pack him some long shorts. While I fully applaud his fashion sense, I doubt that the school will believe his excuses for much longer.  I sigh when, miraculously, the atmosphere is infused with the even breathing of sleeping cherubs. I am just relaxing into a wine-induced oblivion (of course I’m exaggerating) when Gary, my eldest grabs on to my security gate from outside shouting, “Mom, Mom, hurry, open up! Quickly! Hurry!” My heart leaps into my throat. Someone is dead? Someone is chasing him? It’s obvious that something truly horrible has happened”.

“What is it? I somehow blurt out.

“Hurry! Open up! It’s Prison Break”.

 

How I’ve actually made it to Wednesday is beyond me. Perhaps it’s those “happy pills”, maybe the fact that I’m eating better, or more likely, I am simply functioning on auto-pilot.  Things go relatively smoothly this morning. I think I’m used to the chaos and I arrive at work only to realize that I must go shopping to cater for the afternoon meeting.  My boss is subjected to grunts, nods and head shakes from me as I refuse to be civil to her. I do a few things in the office and then head off to the shop to buy the eats. Today is not my lift scheme day and I look forward to a nice quiet lunch with my colleague from my previous job.  It’s really nice and I get back to work relaxed after a glass of wine and a tramezini.  I have a few invitations for the evening (kids are out Wednesday evening with their dad), but I decide to stay home and do my ironing that has been building up for weeks.  I buy myself a bottle of wine, make no supper because I’ve eaten and sit down with a magazine on a chair that I hardly move from for the entire evening. Jarred sits with me doing his homework. I help him because it’s English and I’m not bad at it. When I look for the wine I realize that I left it in my car, which Gary has taken. I sigh! I will have it at 7.30 when he gets home and hubbly will do in the meantime. I make sandwiches at the table and sort out school clothes. Needless to say, I do absolutely no ironing and have a glass of wine at 7.30. I continue to do the Sudoku that I have been doing the whole evening. Vincent and Katie get home at 8.00 and I have to rush them through a bath and then homework.  In bed late again! Jarred then begins to play guitar and make up a song about the politics of the country. I am excited and write down the words. Katie and Vincent listen from their beds.  By bed-time I’ve had about three glass of wine and am sleepy. Uncharacterisically, as I lie down the room begins to spin, and spin, and spin! I end up sick in the bathroom and fall asleep almost immediately.   What an end to my night of semi-solitude. They say, those very wise “they” people, that alcohol affects you more when you’re stressed. I wonder….! It’s a damn good excuse though.

I am pretty sure that I don’t have to mention that the vacating of my bed on Thursday morning is no easy task.  I do, however, succeed! Today we leave with only school bags. No tog bags, no cricket bats, no tackies, no ballet things, no extras at all. I feel free, wild – nothing to forget. The euphoria is intoxicating. This must be Heaven. I am even energized to go grocery shopping this evening. My friend says that she is free this evening. She asks if we should get together. Frankly the idea of wine or any other alcoholic drink, after last night, induces fear and trembling.  I decline.  Work is quiet as I continue to ignore my boss and 2.00 pm brings about my usual lift scheme.   I drop the little ones off, practically begging them to tidy the cottage and go back to work.  I don’t recall this but they say that I told them they could go shopping with me if they tidied up.  At about 4.00pm Jarred arrives at the office and I take him home. I have since decided that I should shop alone, leaving the little ones at home with Jarred to bath and do homework. The outcry that results from this suggestion to Vin and Kate is something I am not qualified to deal with.  I deflate and collapse into my car seat and meekly say, “get in”. They inform me that they “even cleaned the cottage”, in order to be able to go.

 

Shopping to me is a sadistic ritual.  I cannot comprehend those perverse individuals who actually enjoy the dreaded ordeal.  Add on two children who want everything in sight and who, after pleading to accompany me, want to go home after half an hour. Include fist-fights, sibling verbal abuse and disappearances every five minutes for free samples, and the whole thing intensifies ten-fold. I arrive at the shop at about 5.00 pm and get home by 7.30.  I am comforted by a well-meaning woman who tells me that my two fighting little maniacs are completely normal.  This is after she hears me yelling hysterically at them to “STOP IT!” and “I TOLD YOU TO STAY AT HOME”, accompanied by several other expletives. I tell her that I’ve had to go through it twice, having two older sons as well, and that I must have done something particularly evil in a previous incarnation.  She tells me that I look too young to have two older sons and I almost kiss her.  I feel haggard and worn, but decide to preserve the tiny morsel of dignity that I have left.  

 

I arrive home in the dark with two tired children who have not as yet bathed or, horror of horrors, done homework. Supper is no problem. MacDonalds, I love you! The cottage is in a dismal condition and if they had indeed tidied it up, a hurricane has since swept through it.  I try to tidy while Jarred brings a few shopping bags from the car. We eat and Katie takes ages to finish her food while I jump around uneasily trying not to think of bathing and homework.  Vincent gets stomach ache and needs the toilet but can’t find matches for the candle that has replaced the broken light bulb.  He eventually decides he has to go in the dark but five minutes later is wandering around bare-bummed looking for a torch! Jarred is ranting about how unfair it is because no-one will help him unpack the car and I am cleaning, packing away groceries and emptying the garbage bin, while yelling at Vincent to get back into the pitch black bathroom and onto the toilet. Katie, meanwhile continues to eat at two chews per minute and Xena, my Doberman, runs in and eats Vincent’s burger! Thank goodness Katie has two burgers, having got the special in case Gary is home for supper.  This extra one is given to Vincent. When I remind my daughter that she is taking an abnormally long time to eat she throws down her burger saying, “Fine, I will starve”. This results in me telling her what a “princess” she is!

 

Add to this chaotic evening the fact that there is a really young and persistent man that I know who keeps phoning me at the most inconvenient times and you have the makings of a true farce. I kid you not, to the delight and bemusement of my children he phoned and let it ring for a full seven minutes. They, and I, were absolutely amazed. My little ones know all the excuses in the book now when he calls, but this time we just let it ring – our amusement for the evening.

 

Eventually, eventually, eventually clean, educated and well-fed children are lying in their beds.  Unfortunately there is some good stuff on T.V. and the little darlings keep peeking at the screen. Death stare time! Eyes shut! And peace reigns supreme.

 

Friday, FRIday, FriDAY! Happy days! It’s Friday!!!! I have made it. We have made it. We are breathing and relatively sane. One more day to get through. Should be a breeze. And all appears to be fine but looks can be deceiving. I am organized! I am Supermom! Katie’s ballet clothes are ready, lunches are packed into cases and it’s time to go. But dizzyingly quickly we return to the Friday day I lost my mind!  The keys, the panties, the earrings – all effects lasting temporarily however.  My initial horror gives way to amazement as I realize that my distractedness appears to have come along with a burst of genius. I have managed, quite extraordinarily, to work out how to put seven separate documents onto one document on Excel. This involves a lot of copying, pasting, (making small), renaming and finally coming out with a whole new document. I am so impressed with myself that I forget to sulk and run to my boss to tell her how wonderful I am.  She agrees that I am very clever and I see no reason to continue the argument.

 

After the initial shock of all my weird activities of the morning, I begin to feel relatively relaxed.  Katie has ballet and so does her friend, so the other half of the lift scheme does the lifts today.  I do, however, still have to take Jarred home. This changes when he telephones to say that the pub at Education Campus is opening today and he will come over later, probably around three. This all seems fine until my boss, whom I have just made friends with, decides that we can go home early – at three. I try to call Jarred. Surprise, surprise – his phone is off. I have to wait. I can’t very well go storming into the pub to yank him out. In the meantime his older brother calls. I must meet him at home and then take him to Vodacom to sign for his new SIM card. The problem is we must do this by 5.00 as the shop will probably close. The other problem is that I have no idea what time Jarred will put in an appearance.  Gary laughs hysterically when he hears the situation, telling me that I’ve got a long wait ahead of me. I little while later the little ones call me at work to ask if they can make me a surprise from their recipe book. I agree to this asking, as nicely as possible, that they clean up after themselves.  At about 3.30 Gary phones, asking where I am and Jarred eventually arrives at four o’clock. At four fifteen Katie calls, asking how far I am from home because the surprise is waiting. I drop Jarred at home and Gary takes his place in the car. Katie runs out asking where I’m going and saying that the surprise is ready. I assure her that I will not be long. We get to Vodacom, sign the papers and are told that it will cost R65.00. Gary and I look at each other incredulously. Neither of us has money on us.  He decides to drop me at home, as I’m really anxious to have my surprise before the babies’ dad fetches them for the weekend. Gary will fetch my bank-card and go and pay the account. Miraculously we find the card in the car. At home I have a sosatie stick with strawberries, pineapple, banana and dates (because I have given up chocolate for lent) waiting for me on a plate with ice-cream and custard.  Children have an amazing way of erasing a week of stress in an instant, by a simple gesture of love so pure that it melts your insides and touches you to the very core of your being!

 

 Reality, however, has a nasty way of intruding on the most special of moments. My friend arrives to take me for dinner but my ex has not yet collected the children. The place is unbelievably noisy. There is a ridiculous modern musical blasting from the television and Jarred is showing everyone his political song. The atmosphere is mildly crazy but very enjoyable. The ex hoots at the gate for the little ones. Unfortunately at this precise moment my father and brother decide to have a very heated altercation. I do not want my children’s father to hear or see anything about the argument (long story) so I rush the children out as soon as possible.  It is a scene from a black comedy. The more I tell them that they must leave quickly, the more times they return to fetch something that they have forgotten. It is unbelievable! Finally they leave and I breathe a sigh of relief. My eldest son’s girlfriend has been ushered into the cottage to escape the argument inside.  My friend and I leave, I tell Jarred where to hide the keys and I, naively, believe that I am due for a quiet and peaceful weekend.

 

Dinner is uneventful except for when I go to the bathroom, get confused with the doors and end up exiting the ladies and entering a sushi restaurant that I hadn’t been eating at. After the initial confusion, I make a hasty retreat and find my friend outside, waiting for me.  While on my way to the bathroom I discover that Jarred has called me twenty-two times and I have finally heard the phone on the twenty- third try. He tells me that there is trouble at home and on top of this he has dropped my cottage keys into the cottage and cannot get them out. My friend and I end up getting into the cottage by unscrewing one of the security gates, at the same time releasing my Doberman who has been prisoner in the cottage for goodness knows how long. In the meantime I go to find my brother who has passed out in the garden and attempt to help him. The rest is a long, involved and futile story and is best ignored and forgotten.

 

My peaceful Friday ends and I fall into bed and into a deep sleep.

I have big plans for Saturday. I am going to get myself out of debt. I will get up relatively late, go to the bank and draw the money. I will then pay off my clothing accounts, my T.V. and buy my daughter and my friend their birthday presents. I have, however, discovered that in life that you should never plan anything. Go with the flow. That way you can never be irritated! This I have discovered but unfortunately I have never actually learnt from it.

 

I arrive at the bank. None of the banks at the mall have electricity. I swear, various expletives, under my breath and head off to the other mall. I think that I am very clever but at the same time have a sense of foreboding about what I will find at that bank. I am astounded beyond my normal ability to be astounded! The queues begin at the tellers inside the bank (far, far inside the bank), out the door and all the way down to Woollworths, which is about half a city block away. All the other banks have the same problem. I mutter some more swear words, this time including some obscenities about the state of the country and decide on retail therapy, which I most certainly cannot afford.  I head home, make a hubbly (yes, again) and tidy my flat. I am busy with this when my brother’s weird girlfriend starts yelling out my name. Jarred is amazed to see me hurl myself across the room, jump out of my shoes and fling myself onto Katie’s bed, at the same time begging him to tell her that I’m asleep. I close my eyes tightly, praying that she won’t come in.  Jarred, the horror, lets me lie like that for a few minutes, choosing not to tell me that she is gone. I continue to hide for awhile then poor myself a glass of wine (yes, again), put on a load of washing, set up the ironing board and complete all my outstanding ironing. I am Superwoman! I am Wonder Woman! I am Mother! I put washing on the line and it rains! I am Exceedingly Irritated Woman.

 

I, being so damn popular, have three invitations for Saturday evening. My haemorrhoids are agonizing at this stage and I decide I cannot go to the braai. I also don’t feel like visiting the young obsessive phone caller. I decide to surprise my friend and go to him to watch a DVD. The evening is uneventful except for the fact that my eldest son keeps phoning me to yell about how unfair it is that he has to lift my middle son to a party. He rants about how far it is and how it’s unfair to use his girlfriend’s car.  At about ten o’clock I go home and sit with Gary in the cottage until he leaves to fetch his girlfriend. I bath and, exhausted, climb into bed. The cell rings at 12.30. That dreaded call that will inform me that Jarred cannot get a lift home and I must fetch him. I am half asleep and ask Jarred to call me back with directions. Gary calls and tells me where to go. I put my dog in the car – she is astounded (as astounded as a dog can be) and we head off into the unknown, with a set of directions on my lap. I am in some God-forsaken place in the middle of the night but I eventually  find the place after a few more phone calls to Gary. I find the street but not the number. There is no number eighteen. Fortunately I am not alone in my stupidity as the taxi driver who has just arrived is also driving up and down the road in search of number eighteen.  I find it, eventually, around the corner – something that must have slipped the minds of both my sons.  I then spend about ten minutes outside waiting for Jarred to appear, anger causing all my arteries to pulse unusually. I cannot call him because, surprise, surprise, his phone is off! I cannot go in because I am in my pyjamas. I am on the verge of an embolism when he appears at the gate, glass in hand. I am irritated. I am tired. I tell him to throw the drink out.  His friend then proceeds to vomit next to my car. I am petrified. He cannot puke in my car. He sits in the front, window wound down and proceeds to tell me, in a very elevated tone, how much he loves me and what a good person I am. I am almost deaf when we reach home. I flop into bed at 1.30 in the morning.

 

Sunday – wonderful Sunday. I get up late. I go to breakfast with my friends. Have a wonderful Pina Colada (spelling) and then head home. I must go shopping for my friend’s present, but decide to go with him so he can choose it. Then we see a movie. I am relaxed for the first time in a week!  He drops me at home. I iron the load of washing on the line and put on another load. The older boys are home and have toast, biscuits and dips for supper. This is my day, this is my moment, this is my time! I am tired. I am relaxed and I must preserve the last iota of strength that I have to begin this routine all over again!

 

The conclusion of this pitiful but ultimately fulfilling tale – : I am tired, I am stressed but hey I do these things for the people that I love. I love and am loved and nothing is too much  – although it sometimes seems that way.

 

And Monday I want to start gym again! Wish me luck!

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Panic Disorder in Adolescence- What You Need to Know

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 1:20 pm

Anyone can have panic disorder even children and adolescents. Panic disorder in adolescence is not a life threatening illness but it can affect their lives in so many ways. They experience extreme unrealistic fear that can affect their everyday activities. They are excessively worried and tense about so many things in school and their personal lives. They have unreasonable worries about their academic performance and other activities in school. These young people are very self-conscious that they need an assurance that nothing is wrong with them.

About 13% of young people experience some kind of anxiety or panic disorder. Children or adolescents with parents who have panic disorder are more likely to have the same disorder. It affects more women than men.

Panic disorder in adolescence can last for a long period of time and can result to different kinds of problems like low self-esteem, drug or alcohol abuse, skipping school, failure to finish school and anxiety disorder in adulthood. It is important to treat panic disorder as early as possible to avoid other problems.

Symptoms of panic disorder in adolescence include profuse sweating, chest pain, nausea, stomach discomfort, trembling and feeling of unreality. These disturbing symptoms interfere with their daily lives. If parents notice these symptoms in their adolescent son or daughter, they should talk to a mental health professional trained in dealing with panic disorder in adolescence. You need all the information about this disorder to help your child or adolescent overcome this disorder.

There are variety of treatments for panic disorder in adolescence like drug therapy, relaxation techniques and cognitive behavioral therapy. Your child or adolescent do not have to live with terror or extreme fear because panic disorder is a treatable disease.

Finding the best treatment that will work for your child or adolescent is important to help them overcome the disturbing symptoms of panic disorder in adolescence. To learn about panic disorder natural treatment visit Panic Away

To know more about natural remedies visit Great Discovery-Health and Beauty

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Asthma: Symptoms and Cure

  • Posted on January 9, 2010 at 1:20 pm

Asthma is a breathing problem that makes it more difficult for you to get air in and out of your lungs. When a person has asthma, the breathing tubes are sensitive. They may react to smoke, pollen, dust, air pollution, allergies, or other triggers. In a person with asthma, the breathing tubes may tighten, becoming inflamed and swollen. It may get serious and fatal at times. When the breathing tubes react or when they get inflamed, they become narrow. That makes it harder for you to breathe fresh air in and stale air out. Your difficulty in breathing may change, sometimes you will feel fine and sometimes you may have breathing problems.

In older people, it is sometimes difficult to decide whether the problem is asthma or another lung disease or heart disease. Other lung diseases that cause similar problems are bronchitis and emphysema, particularly common in people who smoke. There are many symptoms for asthma; a wheezing sound can be heard while breathing when you have a cold or a feeling that you can’t take enough air into your lungs, the chest may feel tight in cold or problems quite often. Sometimes mucus comes while coughing and it may last more than a week, at times the cough often comes back.

The causes for asthma are difficult to make out. For many people, a tendency to asthma may be inherited. Other factors may also be involved. The basic problem is inflammation of the airways. Some times the problem involved are; smoking cigarettes, cigars, pipes, or anything else, increases your risk of developing asthma symptoms. Asthma can be in the family, inherited. A blood relative with asthma or allergies (father, mother, sister, brother, son, daughter), you are at higher risk of getting asthma. People who are allergic to pollen, pets, or dust are at higher risk of developing asthma. Pollutants such as ozone and particulate matter can make asthma worse and trigger asthma attacks. Some medications which treat heart disease and high blood pressure may cause asthma symptoms or make asthma worse. Proper medications and prescription needs to be taken.

Successful treatment of asthma needs cooperation between the patient and the health care provider. If you have asthma, you have to know your own body well so you can notice when changes happen. Asthma gives early warning signs of trouble. You also have to work closely with a health care provider. You need to know what the best treatments for you are. Many good treatments for asthma are available today. The treatments will relax the air tubes in your lungs and help you breathe easier. The treatments reduce the swelling and inflammation in the air tubes.

Good treatment for your asthma means working with your health care provider on a regular basis, not buying drugstore remedies that may be expensive and may not treat the problem. In fact, asthma may also be triggered by over the counter drugs. Some drugs may cause problems for people with asthma causing irregular heart beats (cardiac arrhythmias).

It’s important to follow your health care provider’s advice about your treatment. Some medicines help prevent asthma. You need to take these medicines all the time, even when you feel well. Other medicines may be needed if your asthma starts to get worse. If your asthma is getting worse, it’s important to start treatment early, as soon as your symptoms begin. It is a chronic disease, like diabetes or heart problems. You need a health care provider who knows how to treat asthma.

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