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how would you handle your daughter staying with a drug addict?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 8:19 pm

My daughter has been with the same loser boyfriend for 5 years. They have a child together. They both lived with me for a year until I found out he was on heroin again. I kicked his worthless a*s out of my house but she is still with him. This loser is now sleeping on his mommy’s couch and is back on the junk again. He has been addicted to heroin off and on for 5 years. I tried to speak about it to her the other day and said that “No one is going to break them up”. This loser is begging her to get an apartment so he can quit mooching off his mommy and mooch off of her. She has a really decent job but almost all her money goes to this crybaby. I guess even junkies mom is tired of taking care of a 30 year old drug addict. My daughter seems to think she can save this worthless piece of crap. She is 23 years old so its not like I can force her to break up with junkie. I tried to understand and be there for them both but after five years I just gave up. Everyone says to tough it out, that she will come to her senses sooner or later, however it has been five years and she can not seem to snap out of it. I banned him from my house so they sit out in his car in front of the house. She can’t go anywhere without him knowing, he has total control over her. She believes everything this junkie tells her, he even told her he watches her baby when she is working. I watch the baby for her, not him, but she believes everything he says. He treats the baby like shit, always yelling at her he has never bought the baby anything. He didn’t even get her a present for her birthday, he had to have his heroin instead.

I guess you can tell I really hate this guy. I wished he would go away and never come back. However, leeches like him find a gulible girl and latch on for life. After one nasty fight I told my daughter sometimes I wished he would just die so she could be free. She told me she wished I was dead too and off her back. My girlfriends told me that this is destroying my relationship with my daugther. Sad thing is I think it is already destroyed. If she had to choose today she would choose him. If it wasn’t for my grandchild I would have thrown her out too.

Anyway she just might get her wish about me dying. This has been effecting me mentally and physically. I used to be happy go lucky and laugh all the time. Now I am just sad and bitter. I am having bad headaches and now I just found out the tumors are back. I am facing major surgery again. I truly think the bitterness had an effect on me and that could be why they came back. I haven’t even told her how sick I am. Why bother. Too bad I may die and leave my grandchild being raised around a junkie. His dad was/is a junkie living with his mommy, now he is a junkie living off his mommy. What chance does this baby have?

God I just hate this guy. I guess what I am asking is what to do? I dont want to be figthing cancer and her. Can’t throw her out because of the baby, can’t get custody of the baby because I need to the money to cover my expenses while I recover from the surgeries.

Any help?

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Separation depression?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 8:18 pm

Let’s face it. I was a lousy parent. Step parent to be exact. When my wife and I got married, she had a daughter that was 5 years old. I tried to be a parent, but I guess the connection was never there. Her real Father was not in her life and I think she resented him over it. I wasn’t much better. I spent a better part of her child hood hooked on meth and binge drinking. I always managed to hold down a job and support my family. But I was young and not prepared to be a parent. I never had any children of my own.

My step daughter gave birth to a baby boy 5 years ago. The moment I held him he became mine. I have never been able to separate myself from him. Thankfully my daughter lives just 2 streets over so I get to see him all I want. Yet, when I am apart from him I get really depressed. I think now I know what it is like to be a parent because I have now been around a child since it was born. His Father is not in his life so I am the next closest thing. I can not begin to tell you how much this child has changed my life. People tell me I am not the same person anymore. I have done a radical change for the better.

Is it possible to become so attached to a child that you can become terribly depressed to be apart from them? Is it possible to be so attached to a child that they change your life forever?

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the father to my child is an alcoholic…?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 4:32 pm

I went out of town this weekend and the first night I was gone he flipped our brand new car and went to jail for D.U.I. We have an 8 month old daughter..I Asked his family not to bail him out …he will get the medical treatment that he needs there…hopefully. He is the best daddy and loves her and me so much… He just can’t control this monster called alcoholism… What can/or should I do?

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Does this make sense to you?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 4:16 pm

Everyone dismisses me. No one listens to me. No one wants to hear that my husband is abusive. Everyone scratches their heads and says, “Now what would make him act so out of character?” or they change the subject or they act like I am making it up.

My husband has said I deserve to die a lonely death. He no longer wants to be married to me, and yet he won’t let me go. He accuses me of playing games with him and trying to drive him crazy when I say what bothers me.

I have three teens. If I get tired or simply tired of the constant battles, my daughters tell me I am a drama queen. This morning I had to get my daughter out of my husband’s car because he was being violently angry and I did not want him to drive her to where she had to go. So he grabbed me and shoved me. I didn’t fight back. Later my daughter told me I put her in a horrible situation and made her feel bad. I did not one thing. Her father was on a binge or something and it was unsafe for her to be in the car. I calmly told both of them I would drive, and he got physical with me.

So, all these things. All this negativity coming at me. Some days I have had enough. Everyone wants me gone and dead, and yet everyone will rationalize my death by saying I was selfish and mentally ill.

The people who act as though I am a complete idiot and as though they wish I would vaporize, are the same people who will soothe their guilt with comments about me being mentally ill and unstable and selfish. Is that reasonable??

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I am divorcing my husband who is an illegal alien…?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 3:22 pm

He is an illegal alien and we had not filed any paperwork at all with the INS. We got married 1 year ago in a state that did not require proof of legal residency to marry, only birth certificates and photo ID. He has a warrant in another state from skipping court on a DWI. He also has a conviction for domestic violence (against me). We have a house together and both our names are on the title. Do I have to give him any $$ if I sell the house, sine he is on the title? Also, we have a daughter together who is 4 months old, and his name is on her birth certificate. He says he will not pay me a cent of child support. How do I garnish his wages if he is illegally working here? I know where he works and who is employer is, I drive by there all the time and see his truck parked out front. I do not want him deported, I just want him to pay me support. He has left me with the house payment and all the bills and I am going broke…

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18 month old won’t drink…?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 1:24 pm

My 18 months old step-daughter won’t drink anything! She has had dry diapers ALOT lately.. This just started pretty recently.. We have her every other week. She ised to LOVE milk and drink from a bottle and i could never get her to drink from a sippy cup. THen all the sudden one week we got her back and she would NOT take a bottle. I asked her mom, she said try a cup. So I gave her sippy cup and she drank a little bit and now all she will do is drink like 1/2 ounce and then she acts like shes scared of it.. WHY?… She is also not walking, not cruising, hardly pulls up on anything, doesnt talk, and she shakes real bad when I get her up in the morning..?? I know something is wrong with this child. I am going to take her to a doctor.. Shes very scared and skiddish. When she comes to us from her moms house, she is very different. I can;t talk to her mom about anything because she is the biggest liar in the world. She lies about everything and just gives me BS answers all the time! Thanks
She is actually underweight.. Well shjes like in the 1% for her age!! When we got joint custody at 1 year, she was wearing 3-6 month clothing.. She has gained 6lbs in the past 5 months since weve had her and her hair has grown like 4 inches!.. She says dada a little.. And you don;t understand, she will not “pick her own cup” .. She is not like that, she can’t do that normal stuff. She is like a newborn when it comes to that. I dont think shes like other 18 month olds, but then again Ive never been around anoth 18 month old! So I am lost.. BUT I did make an appt for her and they said I CANT BRING HER! I have to go up and get paper work that my husband and her mom has to fill out and THEN I can take her.. So this week I will be taking her. I DO HOPE that we can get full custody. Because I know something is wrong. I have gotten reports of her mom giving her nyquil and not feeding her and etc.. BAD stuff! Thanks for all the answers!

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My husband and daughter both critisize my poor driving skills?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 1:22 pm

My husband has totaled two cars. He got my keys one morning before I got out of bed, went drinking, and flipped my car five times that afternoon. He has wrecked his car many times and finally totaled it. He finally got a long sentence in rehab. Tonight after a weekend pass, he made fun of my driving as I was taking him back to the halfway house.

My daughter that is sixteen failed the computerized driving test two days ago.

I have been driving over thirty years and have been in one minor traffic accident that was my fault and that was over twenty years ago. I have had one speeding ticket in my life. What should I do about the constant criticizism of my driving abilities?

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Is Biden’s daughter 0bama’s official coke taster?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 1:21 pm

Video Offered for Sale Purports to Show Biden’s Daughter Snorting Cocaine
The New York Post reports a video purporting to show Ashley Biden — daughter of Vice President Joe Biden — snorting cocaine is being offered for sale.

A video purporting to show Ashley Biden — daughter of Vice President Joe Biden — snorting cocaine reportedly is being offered for sale.

The New York Post reported that it was shown a 90-second clip of a 42-minute video by a lawyer claiming to represent an anonymous “friend” of the vice president’s daughter. The lawyer, Thomas Dunlap, and another man say the video shows Biden’s daughter using the drug at a house party this month in Delaware.

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2009/03/28/video-offered-sale-purports-bidens-daughter-snorting-cocaine/

***********

Note, libs, that the story is from the NY Post, Fox only carried it.

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What should I do about my 22 year old daughter?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 1:21 pm

My daughter who had one child(4years) and let her mother n law have guardianship of her. then she had another child (9 months) and she is keeping this one. She divorced her husband.(crack head/ heroin addict) mother n law still has child. my daughter is very close to this woman. this woman loves drama. my daughter used to be very wild. today i had her over for the day and found that i am 99% possitive that she took $10.00 from me. she denied it got mad told me to not come over and that she was never coming back to my house. said something about “you fu**ing people” not quite sure why on that one. her oldest child is scared of me and my hubby. i love my daughter but cant handle all this drama with her. what should i do about this? why do i feel so upset over what she did to me? I feel bad for bringing this up to her. i feel like i did something wrong but i didnt do anything to her she did it all to me.

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Hubby may be out of work for awhile but expects me to stay home and do all for his children. is this fair?help?

  • Posted on September 7, 2010 at 1:21 pm

My husband has been having all kinds of pain lately in relation to the right side of his chest, his back, some down his arm and near his stomach when he eats certain things. He is doped up on pain meds and relaxers right now from a doc and two antibiotics for a bacteria in his stomach called H. Pylori. He is taking amoxicillian (antibiotic), clarithromycin (antibiotic), oxycontin (muscle relaxer), cyclobenzaprine (pain), and nexium(heartburn). His work wont let him go back to work unless he doesnt take the pain med which he cant cuz he gets pain so bad and almost keels over. He has been in and out of the hospital numerous times and they find nothing.

They have run tests on him for heart, gallbladder, lungs, liver, you name it. He did have a scope and they found a hiatal hernia but the doc doesnt beleive that is hurting him and that it can be treated with nexium. I believe he needs to be refered to a bigger and better place but he keeps fighting me on it. I think that it will only be a matter of time before he finally stops being an *** and listens. These medicines are making him an angry nasty person. The doc says that he may have to sit at home and treat the bacteria and that may make him feel better but of course my husband is anxious to get back to work and will do whatever it takes.

Well, I am perfectly capable of working. I finished school to be a teacher but there are no jobs right now but i can obviously sub but if we have his children like we do every other week i cant take his son to school, i can only take his daughter and our son together to day care before i get to school. We have to drive his son into town which is about a 15 min drive the same time i have to be at a school to sub.

I suggested we have his two kids on the weekends and he is throwing a fit and thinks i should sit at home cuz i wont make much anyway because i got to pay day care. we certainly dont have money to pay before and after school care for his son plus his daughter and our son together. Well, i wouldnt have to pay so much if he was capable of watching them but i dont think he is on all those medicines. I dont think he will be able to take his son to school either. His son cant ride the bus cuz we live in a different district than his mother and of course everything is conveinent for her but not for us….i think my husband is being unreasonable when I feel that we need to be able to pay our bills and put food on the table and he only is going to be getting checks for about half of what he normally makes. I got school loans to pay for too. I would like to try and sub as much as i possibly can.

Child support is not an issue since he has papers saying that custody is 50 50 with no support but it can still be 50 50 if we take them every weekend and all summer or a reasonable amount that the mother agrees to. Anyways, I am also pregnant with our second child together. I do not need this stress. We need to pay our bills. What do I do? Please help??!
for real people do you not actually read and then just right some smart alec answer? i am not the worst speller but what the hell does that have to with the problem?
my duty is not housework! screw you sexist people and fyi my husband has a job but is not working because of this pain and or illness…but id guess you would know that if you were reading
i have to be at school anywhere between 7:30 am and 8 am and his son has to be at school at 8:15…there is no before school care at his school there is before and after school care at another school that buses them for a big price…see my point…they wont watch him at school before it starts
not to mention the cheapest day care is far from his sons school and any school i sub at most likely is not close to his sons school either unless i am subbing at his sons school which will not happen all the time obviously..i cant ask to do that they have to call me
i live around a big school district with lots of schools and can sub every day and i need to be available…i would at least make an extra 400 a month on the days that i only have my son…if i had to have the other girl it would only be 200 but thats at least some groceries and gas….hello?

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