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What is good advice to give a 19 year old dating a 26 year old?

  • Posted on May 4, 2011 at 7:20 pm

My 19 yr old daughter lives with me, she works, goes to school and tries to stay out of trouble. A lot of the people she’s known are recently in trouble or dead (from heroin overdose). Thankfully, she does not engage in heavy drug use. But of course she knew him from high school and she is having issues dealing with that. Plus some of her other friends left to college or have been arrested for drugs. This town has a lot of that going on. She met a 26 year old that has befriended her. They work together and he seems like a nice enough guy. I dont judge him but I am a little leary about his intentions. Come on now he is 26. So, what else could he possibly want with a young inexperienced 19 year old. I guess I can give her credit and just let things be. But I really want to be helpful and sorta warn her but not make her feel like she cant make good decisions. This guy just got out of a 5 year reationship like 3 months ago. Thats always hard. Should I just keep my nose out of it and let the chips fall where they may or lend some advice and say be careful..stuff like that.

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Teens and drugs–Parental advice needed?

  • Posted on April 23, 2011 at 7:21 pm

Okay, my daughter is taking drugs. She’s only 16. I didn’t realize it until it got bad enough. I found out after finding it in her car. It would have been a lot easier to deal with pot or acid. I did that shot in the early eighties. I know that she’s not addicted to the drugs she on. She has taking and experimented with different kinds she confessed after she denied it. I know I’m still going to have face her with consequences for her actions. So a liitle help with ways to do so. Is much appreciated.

I don’t know if you need to know the drugs but here itt started off with weed which I don’t think is all that bad, heroin ice acid cocaine mushrooms.

She confessed to drinking at parties I didn’t even ask her that… So advice please

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what would you do(guys advice)?

  • Posted on April 21, 2011 at 11:21 pm

I’ve been married for two years. I got married bc I decided I needed to be the best father I can be for my daughter who is now 3. My wife was hanging out with another man at work and the gym about a year ago and wanted to leave me. I said OK bye and she came back and begged me to stay and I gave in. She said they never kissed or had relations. She then set out on a mission to get pregnant again and we had another child who is 2 months now. I am very unhappy in my home but my children are very important to me, the reason I married is bc we broke up before and I couldn’t see my children bc she told the court i was a heroin addict, a totally false accusation and called the cops and said i beat her. I don’t know what to do bc I love my children and i feel like as long as i’m here i protect them from her and her families craziness, but i also would like to have a life i enjoy. any advice would be helpful.

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Getting a divorce and need some financial advice?

  • Posted on April 20, 2011 at 8:20 pm

He is cheating on me with a meth addict. We have a young daughter.

I have him nailed to the wall. BUT!!!

I’m the stay at home mom who never had anything in her name, no credit, no job…nothing.

He is fixing to file. If I beat him to the punch, I come off better.

I can’t afford to pay the startup attorney fees.

I will be starting a job soon, but not soon enough.

He has taken all things of value out of the home minus a few odds and ends that, when pawned/sold, would bring about $600-$800 *IF* I’m lucky.

I need $2000 for the attorney and $1000 for the private investigator. How does one go about doing this?

There is no one I can borrow from. I have no collateral. Nothing.

There’s no hope for me, is there??? :(

I will answer any questions and add info where necessary, so please check back in and try to help me.
I tried legal aide and they said they are too busy to take my case but could help me in a couple of months. We are in a small town and he has the best lawyer on retainer, but hasn’t filed for separation or anything.

I have no solid proof because his friends and family are helping hide what he is doing.

He was born and raised here and knows everyone.

The only lawyer I could find within a reasonable distance says he needs a start up fee and that my ex would have to pay the rest.

He can guarantee that.

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Need some outside advice?

  • Posted on March 26, 2011 at 10:20 pm

I knew this girl that was on heroin, she had an ahole bf that was an addict too. I did everything I could to help this girl, rode her to work, to see her daughter, to the meth clinic, listened to her problems and gave her a shoulder to cry on, never wanting anything in return but for her to lose the bf and get clean. What I got instead was lied to, burned down, disrespected, have stuff made up about me and told to everyone she would meet. So as u can imagine things ended badly between us.

Fast forward a year and a half, she is clean, she dropped the bf and from what her cousin says, she is doing very well. Thats great. But here is the problem, now that her cousin is clean and free from the ahole bf she wants to get her cousin and me back together. I already told her I wanted nothing to do with her cousin anymore, but knowing women the way I do, she is going to do what ever she wants anyway.

Now take into account this girl I tried to help, is NOT behind this. She still thinks im the one that was the ahole in the whole thing I would bet. I guess what im asking is what would u do in this situation. And, what would u do if this girl actually took responsability for what she did, appologized and wanted to make amends? Not that she has or I think she ever will.

I really dont need the drama in my life, and I honestly cant think of one reason having her back in my life would benefit me. Whats your take?

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My daughter’s boyfriend broke up with her. Advice?

  • Posted on March 8, 2011 at 10:17 pm

She is almost 19, bf has just turned 21. His birthday wish was to go to a bar and get drunk. He did. My daughter and his friends have tried to get him to at least drink less, but he told her today that she’s “too much on his case” about the drinking. It’s his life, but he’s being a butt. I have no advice to give her because I’ve never been there. I told her that maybe she should give him some space. She had already said something to him in that direction, but he told her he’s an alcoholic and he can’t change for her. Anyone out there with some words of wisdom?

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Fiancee is living in the past & still aching for her old fiance! Advice, MATURE ANSWERS?

  • Posted on March 6, 2011 at 5:22 am

Im a 29yo firefighter and have been in love with my now fiance who is 26 for 7years. She was 19 when i met her and she had a 3yr old daughter with her then fiance who was a musician. I knew i never had a chance with her at that point as she was crazy in love with her then fiance who she dated since she was 13, she honestly couldn’t stop expressing her love for him, basically everyone knew how in love they were with each other, 4yrs ago he died of a heroin overdose and she completely fell apart. We ended up getting together and 2yrs ago and we are now engaged and her 10yr old daughter is so lovely i love both them but she always talks of her daddy. My fiance sometimes looks like she is falling apart, she never grieved for him and everyone says part of her died with him. I turned on her the other day for living in the past when i wanted to talk about having a baby together & she told me she wasn’t ready, i felt horrible after. She told me that she loses what she loves most both her parents,brother,nephew,aunt have died. I also asked her if she thinks we would have been together if he hadn’t of died and she just looked through me and didn’t say anything and i ended up walking out. I love this woman with all my heart and i feel close to her daughter, i wont give up on her. How can i help her get over this completely?

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Fiancee is living in the past & still aching for her fiance who died! Advice, MATURE ANSWERS?

  • Posted on March 4, 2011 at 9:21 am

Im a 29yo firefighter and have been in love with my now fiance who is 26 for 7years, even though we weren’t together until a year ago. She was 19 when i met her and she had a 3yr old daughter with her then fiance who was a well known musician in a band & never really talked to her only him a few times. I knew i never had a chance with her at that point as she was crazy in love with her then fiance who she dated since she was 13, she honestly couldn’t stop expressing her love for him, basically everyone knew how in love they were with each other, he was a guitarist and would write her songs, he worshiped them. Four years ago he died of a heroin overdose and she completely fell apart, she disappeared for a while and doesn’t seem like the same person anymore. The only way she ever tries to deal with stuff is by writing poetry about him or her pain. We ended up getting together and we are now engaged and her 10yr old daughter is so lovely i love both them but she always talks of her daddy. My fiance sometimes looks like she is falling apart, she never grieved for him and everyone says part of her died with him. I turned on her the other day for living in the past when i wanted to talk about having a baby together & she told me she wasn’t ready, i felt horrible after. She told me that she loses what she loves most both her parents,brother,nephew,aunt have died. I also asked her if she thinks we would have been together if he hadn’t of died and she just looked through me and didn’t say anything and i ended up walking out. I love this woman with all my heart and i feel close to her daughter, i wont give up on her. How can i help her get over this completely?

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Fiancee is living in the past & still aching for her fiance who died! Advice, MATURE ANSWERS?

  • Posted on March 3, 2011 at 11:20 am

Im a 29yo firefighter and have been in love with my now fiance who is 26 for 7years, even though we weren’t together until a year ago. She was 19 when i met her and she had a 3yr old daughter with her then fiance who was a well known musician in a band & never really talked to her only him a few times. I knew i never had a chance with her at that point as she was crazy in love with her then fiance who she dated since she was 13, she honestly couldn’t stop expressing her love for him, basically everyone knew how in love they were with each other, he was a guitarist and would write her songs, he worshiped them. Four years ago he died of a heroin overdose and she completely fell apart, she disappeared for a while and doesn’t seem like the same person anymore. The only way she ever tries to deal with stuff is by writing poetry about him or her pain. We ended up getting together and we are now engaged and her 10yr old daughter is so lovely i love both them but she always talks of her daddy. My fiance sometimes looks like she is falling apart, she never grieved for him and everyone says part of her died with him. I turned on her the other day for living in the past when i wanted to talk about having a baby together & she told me she wasn’t ready, i felt horrible after. She told me that she loses what she loves most both her parents,brother,nephew,aunt have died. I also asked her if she thinks we would have been together if he hadn’t of died and she just looked through me and didn’t say anything and i ended up walking out. I love this woman with all my heart and i feel close to her daughter, i wont give up on her. How can i help her get over this completely?

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Fiancee is living in the past & still aching for her fiance who died! Advice, MATURE ANSWERS?

  • Posted on March 2, 2011 at 1:21 pm

Im a 29yo firefighter and have been in love with my now fiance who is 26 for 7years. She was 19 when i met her and she had a 3yr old daughter with her then fiance who was a musician. I knew i never had a chance with her at that point as she was crazy in love with her then fiance who she dated since she was 13, she honestly couldn’t stop expressing her love for him, basically everyone knew how in love they were with each other, 4yrs ago he died of a heroin overdose and she completely fell apart. We ended up getting together and 2yrs ago and we are now engaged and her 10yr old daughter is so lovely i love both them but she always talks of her daddy. My fiance sometimes looks like she is falling apart, she never grieved for him and everyone says part of her died with him. I turned on her the other day for living in the past when i wanted to talk about having a baby together & she told me she wasn’t ready, i felt horrible after. She told me that she loses what she loves most both her parents,brother,nephew,aunt have died. I also asked her if she thinks we would have been together if he hadn’t of died and she just looked through me and didn’t say anything and i ended up walking out. I love this woman with all my heart and i feel close to her daughter, i wont give up on her. How can i help her get over this completely?

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