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Does anybody find this disturbing also?

  • Posted on March 7, 2011 at 1:21 pm

My 18 year old daughter graduates HS and immediately gets involved with a 30 year old man, moves in with him after 3 months and now is pregnant with his child. The man has had previous felony drug charges and drug addiction problems and is clean now. They both work, but I cant help to wonder why in the world would this guy now 31 want to date a teenager? Anybody please voice your thoughts on this.

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Does anybody have a REALLY good punch recipe?

  • Posted on January 18, 2011 at 10:17 am

My daughter is having her 1st birthday party this weekend and we’re having about 20 guests. Most of them will be adults. I’m needing a punch recipe (non-alcoholic) that will be a big hit. Maybe something pink with raspberry sherbet….

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Does anybody have hypothyroidism? or know enough about it? PLEASE read if you do :(?

  • Posted on November 27, 2010 at 5:24 am

Sorry this is alot to read but i really would like somebody who knows about this to help me :(

I am almost positive i have it, but i think my doctor is just blowing it off as high blood pressure. Because symptoms of high blood pressure can mimic a few of hypothyroidism, the only thing is that High blood pressure is also a symptom of hypothyroidism..

But i have alot more symptoms of hypothyroidism. Including feeling weak, sore, tired, confused, very dry skin. I could probably go on but it is really getting worse. When my daughter is in daycare i come home and sleep literally all day i need an alarm to wake me up. I have to drink like 3-4 cans of diet coke a day so i can be awake and able to take care of my daughter. I do feel fine sometimes but the majority i feel like crap. And I feel like if i didnt set an alarm i wouldnt wake up, it sucks because i go back to school on monday and i know it is going to be extremely hard with how bad i feel. I never felt like this until i was pregnant and after i had my daughter but it has been 3 months since she was born :(

My moms boyfriend is a pediatrition and thinks my doctor is being an idiot and is trying to help me out, i am just trying to get all my test results from the doctor so he can see them. My doctor told me that one of my tests showed i had low thyroid levels and he said it was fine.. obviously it isnt. I am on high blood pressure medication which IS making my blood pressure go down, because it gets water out of my bloodstream to make the pressure go down, it is still above the normal blood pressure though, it probably averages about 125/185 which isnt bad but not as low as it should be. but i still feel like crap! i am going crazy i really wish somebody could help me figure out what to do to make myself feel better. I have already asked a few questions about this and got some answers that pretty much assured me this really is the problem i am dealing with.

I just want to know what i can do to feel better in the meantime? Especially with starting school on monday. And i plan on seeing another doctor but i just dont have time right now i dont know what to do

I dont expect to get alot of answers i am just hoping somebody will be able to help me out a little bit? i probably sound pathetic but i feel awful.

Not to mention i am a pretty young mom so it is hard enough as it is, i do not need another thing like this added on top of it . I want to be healthy for my daughter, and for myself i just dont know what to do :(

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I have to read a historical fiction book and do a report on it does anybody know of one that is very good?

  • Posted on September 18, 2010 at 4:23 pm

Has anybody read a historical fiction that was very interesting and kept them wanting to read Here are some choices my teacher gave and i need a few good ones, THANKS!

Historical Fiction
All Quiet on the Western Front Erich Maria Remarque World War I
The First Man in Rome Colleen McCullough Ancient Rome
The Ten Thousand Michael Curtis Ford Ancient Greece
The Things They CarriedTim O’Brien Vietnam War
The Virtues of War Steven Pressfield Alexander the Great
The Count of Monte CristoAlexandre Dumaspost-revolutionary France
The Bonesetter’s DaughterAmy TanChina, early 20th c.
Darkness at NoonArthur KoestlerUSSR
ExodusLeon UrisIsrael
The HajLeon UrisMiddle East conflict
Like Water for ChocolateLaura EsquivelMexico, 19th c.
Memoirs of a GeishaArthur GoldenJapan, 20th c.
Nectar in a SeiveKamala MarkandayaIndia, 20th c.
The Poisonwood BibleBarbara KingsolverAfrica, 20th c.
QB VIILeon Urispost-World War II
Mila 18Leon UrisNazi / Holocaust
Sacred HungerBarry Unsworthslave trade
The Samurai’s GardenGail TsukiyamaChina/Japan, WWII
Women of the SilkGail TsukiyamaJapan, early 20th c.
Weep Not, ChildNgugi wa Thiong’oKenya – Mau Mau War
To Swim Across the World: A NovelFrances ParkKorea, 1940s
The Good EarthPearl BuckChina, 19th c.
The Agony and the EcstasyIrving StoneMichelangelo
ShogunJames ClavellJapan
Don Quixote, La ManchaMiguel Cervanteschivalry/ Spain
Anna KareninaLeo Tolstoypre-revolutionary Russia
Crime and PunishmentFyodor Dostoevskypre-revolutionary Russia
Cry, the Beloved CountryAlan PatonSouth Africa, apartheid
Darkness at NoonArthur KoestlerUSSR/ 1920s
Dr. ZhivagoBoris PasternakRussian Revolution
FriedrichHans Peter RichterJews in Germany, 20th c.
Les MiserablesVictor HugoParis, social system injustices
Madame BovaryGustave FlaubertFrance, 19th c./ women’s roles
No Longer At EaseChinua AchebeNigeria, 1950s
So Far From the Bamboo GroveYoko Kawashima WatkinsJapan, Korea, WWII
The Red TentAnita Diamantancient Israel
The Walking DrumLouis L’Amour12th c. Europe, Asia
Year of Impossible GoodbyesSook Nyui ChoiKorea, WWII
A Fine BalanceRohinton MistryIndia
Almost a RevolutionTong shenChina
CaravansJames MichenerAfghanistan
Clear Light of DayAnita DesaiIndia
For Whom the Bell TollsErnest HemingwaySpain
From the Land of Green GhostsPascal Koo ThweBurma
Girl With a Pearl EarringTracy ChevalierRenaissance Europe
HiroshimaJohn HerseyJapan
Little Drummer GirlJohn Le CarreMiddle East
LongitudeDava SobelAge of Exploration
Galileo’s DaughterDava SobelScientific Revolution
One Day in the Life of Ivan DenisovitchAlexander SolzhenitsynUSSR
PeonyPearl BuckChina
Rumor of WarPhilip CaputoVietnam War
Sacred WillowDung van Mai ElliottVietnam War
The White NileAlan MooreheadAfrica, 19th c.
Winds of WarHerman WoukWorld War II
Pillars of the EarthKen Follettmiddle ages
World Without EndKen Follettmiddle ages
The Hunt for Red OctoberTom Clancythe Cold War
Alias GraceMargaret Atwood19th c. Canada/psychology
Eaters of the DeadMichael CrichtonVikings
The Kite RunnerKhaled HosseiniAfghanistan/Taliban
A Thousand Splendid SunsKhaled HosseiniAfghanistan/Taliban/women
Deadly TruthA. Heller, Z.HellerSouth Africa/apartheid
A Man of the PeopleChinua Achebepost-colonial Africa
No Longer At EaseChinua AchebeAfrica

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anybody else sort of addicted to having babies?

  • Posted on September 14, 2010 at 4:19 am

When I had my daughter I loved having such a teeny tiny newborn to hold and to love. When she was 8 weeks old and I looked at her hospital photo and realized how much she’d grown I was already thinking about getting pregnant again. Although I didn’t, we waited until she was a year old to try,. But seriously finances permitting, I’d have tons of babies.

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30 years ago they had a prescription drug for colic, pink color. Anybody know what it was? Need it for my son?

  • Posted on July 28, 2010 at 4:24 am

My mom was able to get a prescription for colic 30 years ago, she can’t remember what it was, but she swears by it. I had EXTREME colic. I’ve asked doctors they have no idea what was given to my mom. It was clearish pink, could have been anti-gas medicine for all I know. My daughter had colic, she is older, however my son has it now. Any help would be appreciated. And I don’t want to hear about happiest baby on the block book, because I had tried everything w/my daughter, and now son, just like my mom tried everything w/me.

Everything I’ve tried drug wise(not emotional wise):
Gripe Water(given to me by a friend/nurse)
Mylicon
Colic Tablets Hyland
Gripe Water w/completely different ingredients

Just need to know what would have been prescribed 30 years ago. I’m very familiar about non medicated treatments, music, etc, just need the name of the drug.

Thank you

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Have anybody out there being to a crack house? what is it like in there?

  • Posted on January 2, 2010 at 4:00 am

my friend told me a horrible story about a girl and her mother
her mother was a crack addict and the mother sold her to the dealer for drugs she was only 11 and the daughter did it also she was hooked to the crack also because her mother introduce her to the drugs since she was nine is a horrific story but is a true one i just can’t believe things happen like this in AMERICA everyone sleeping with the little girl for her mother to support the crack addiction
anybody knows a similar situation because is unbelievable this is going on

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Teenage drinking – does anybody care? Whose responsibility is it?

  • Posted on January 1, 2010 at 7:21 pm

This article is my opinion – it is based on my years of work and my experience – as a doctor, psychiatrist, mother and grandmother. I am writing this article, about excessive levels of alcohol intake in an increasing number of teenagers.

I confess to being not only concerned but somewhat bemused.

Firstly I ask the question – ‘In the last 40yrs, has there been a major change to our bodies?’

In my work I kept up to date with new advances. Yet, now I fear that during that time I must have missed some major breakthrough in knowledge. If not, then I am left with the question ‘does anybody care?’ If so, who?

Let me explain.

For 35 years I always enjoyed my work – except for a period of six months during my training for the higher degree, MRCPsych (UK), when I was scheduled to work for six months at an alcohol unit. In my view, the mind is and always has been the most important organ in the body – a car whose steering wheel doesn’t work is not the best vehicle to drive on life’s complicated roads.

But I found this the most depressing time I ever encountered at work – for one reason. Most of the people I worked with were there as a result of their own deliberate actions. Some people e.g. those, who had unresolved grief, drank initially for a reason – but alcohol did not heal anything. It merely added the problem of depression. I witnessed the slow devastation of many lives.

Some people have an inherited tendency to alcohol addiction. This means that person must abstain from drinking alcohol or suffer the consequences of dependence. Allergy to nuts can kill – that person must never eat nuts or they will die. I am not unsympathetic – on the contrary I have great concern for young people.

However, let us be honest! The vast majority of young people who drink excessively do so because they choose and like to do so, their peers and friends do so, it is ‘what they do’. In typical teenage fashion, they are not, apparently, concerned about any consequences. But, it is surprising - considering the level of drinking of many o the adults around them? Who are they supposed to learn from?

I write, not as a critical observer telling people what to do, without knowing about difficulties myself. I lived my childhood and teenage years before medication for asthma – be assured, that is not an easy option. I have had a lot of ill health – unbidden and without self cause.

I did not tell people what to do in my work – I listened, treated, guided and gave them options for an alternative way of thinking/believing/acting. They had choice to listen and change – or not.

The experience of working in the alcohol unit has never left my memory. Most of the patients were young and potentially healthy, many were in their twenties and early thirties, but were gradually eroding their health, intelligence, family lives, marriages, and their careers. It was sad. An 8 yrs old girl came to visit her mother. Very soon after the daughter had left, her mother had no memory of having a daughter. Alcohol adversely affects the short term memory – without which life has little meaning.

It has been recognised for a long time in the medical world that women are much more easily damaged by alcohol than men, yet, young women are now reportedly drinking as much if not more than men. Add to which there are the possible damaging effect on  babies born to mothers who drink.

The amounts that had been drunk by the patients in the ward, to get them to the state of needing the unit to help them, was on average much less than the young people drink in today’s alcohol liberal society, and it had taken only about 10yrs of fairly dedicated drinking to reach their damaged state. The other factor was that these men and women had started drinking in their late teens – not the much younger age groups who drink now. Nowadays – there is more volume of alcohol drunk, at a younger age and drinks are much higher in unit equivalence.

Now, this is where I came in.

Can anyone who knows much more and is cleverer than me tell me where I can find the article /book/research I must read to bring my knowledge up to date?

I want to see the evidence that tells me about the change which must, in all honesty and intelligence, have taken place in the human body in the past 30yrs to explain the unbelievable levels of alcohol intake that many young people are actually allowed to drink. It is no excuse for a parent to say ‘he/she goes out and I don’t know what they do’ about a teenage son or daughter. Parents, do you not care? You have to take responsibility by giving continued control and guidance – and by being good role models. Boundaries are necessary – but parental authority, control with mutual respect cannot start in the teenage years – it must start in early childhood and requires time, patience, boundaries and love.

( But that is another topic.) 

Getting back to my question about further knowledge – let me be specific.

- Has the liver somehow become more resistant to alcohol damage?  NO

- Has the stomach lining got thicker or stronger to prevent ulceration?  NO

- Has the brain suddenly got an ability to generate more memory cells so that alcoholic dementia does not occur? NO 

- Have adolescent brains suddenly matured early? NO

- Have miracles of evolution happened? NO

Cirrhosis of the liver was unheard of a few years ago in the younger age groups. Young people are now dying of cirrhosis of the liver. The problem with alcohol damage is that the end result is not immediate, but, as in lung cancer from smoking, it creeps up in the background like an evil stalker waiting to strike.

Another reason I ask this question, about possible new knowledge and ‘does anybody care’, is that the government in the UK has made drinking possible at all hours and alcohol is now allowed to be sold very cheaply, in prominent places in supermarkets and with much stronger equivalence of units/vol?

WHY – knowing the effects of alcohol, I cannot find a moral reason.

Finally, I ask ‘does anybody care’ because parents are actually allowing the drinking by paying for the alcohol – as most 11-15 yrs old or even older teenagers do not earn money. Some parents take the attitude  ‘ they’ll grow out of it’ or ‘they are sensible’. Do not rely on that erroneous belief.

Alcohol damage – to liver and brain – is irreversible.

Teenage years are maturing years. The brain is not yet mature. If health is ruined at this stage, then all future adult life is spoilt. In my opinion, the parents are still responsible for the health and wellbeing of their teenagers. Who else has authority and responsibility? Oh – of course, the schools, teachers and the state! Sorry, I forgot – how silly of me.

Where is the big breakthrough that I cannot find? There isn’t one.

Those six months working in the alcohol unit showed me a side of human nature, which, when accessed, strengthened and fed by alcohol, did not value life, family, ability, friend, or child – a side which took the path to slow destruction via initial spurious and transient jollity and camaraderie, through depression to decline and oblivion.

That side is being allowed and, often, even encouraged to become stronger in teenagers – by denial of responsibility and control by parents, and by a government that allows alcohol to be freely available and more potent. The fabric of society will be eroded by antisocial behaviour fuelled by alcohol, and by damaging the very people who society will rely on in the future. In my opinion, whatever the government state or parents say – those who let teenagers drink excessively DO NOT CARE.

Teenagers may not experience hangovers, and direct instructional education may hold little sway against combined peer pressure and lack of confidence. Teenagers tend to want other teenagers to ‘do what I do’, or ‘I want to do what you do’ – feeling safer with a ‘solidarity’ with others of the same age. To be accepted and ‘part of the gang’ is more important to many than ‘what may happen’.

I have written ‘Choice for Teenagers’  poetry book specifically for teenagers – using metaphors and rhyming verse in an attempt to strengthen the teenage psyche to promote health and discussion – in a gentle, non- directive manner. Some poems are read by me on my secondary school website.

The books are deliberately inexpensive – only the cost of a few glasses of wine or beer – and can be purchased via the website shown in the resource box.

Parents, wake up, take action before it is too late – or your children will die before you. If you haven’t experienced grief in your lives yet, you surely will- if you let them drink excessively. As a psychiatrist I can tell you that loss of a child is the greatest grief anyone can face.

There will be no resurrection and no adult life for teenagers whose brain or liver is irreversibly damaged.

 For those with younger children, build up your relationship NOW by spending time and effort with them and by setting a good example for them.

(Longer version of this article is on my website.)

Dr Audrey Coatesworth .

Article – Copyright A Coatesworth2009

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