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how can I cope with my daughter seeing her biological father?

  • Posted on March 12, 2011 at 2:17 pm

Hi there, I am 19 years old and I have a 23 month old daughter. I am also pregnant with my second (14 weeks 2 days)
Her father was only in her life from the time she was 4 months old to the time she was 12 months old.
Other then that it has been the man that was with me my entire pregnancy up to 4 months and from 12 months to present.
Her biological father through the courts eyes can not be proven unfit… However here is a little bit of history on him….

he has a criminal record with the police.
he is known around our town as a physco
he never played with our daughter
he never fed our daughter
he never bathed our daughter
he never changed our daughters bum or got her dressed
I could not leave my daughter alone with him or else she would scream bloody murder, come to find out he has hit her.
When I was pregnant with her he always had his girlfriends try to beat me up and at one point, he threatened to poor gasoline on me and light me on fire while i was sleeping.
He comes from a broken and abusive family… his mom and dad are alcoholics, his sister has 3 kids and is in a very abusive relationship, and both her and her boyfriend beat their children.
His dad is on heavy drugs and also an alcoholic, and his brother is in and out of physc wards hes a drunk and drug addicted, he is a chronic liar (literally) He steals from big brand name stores and takes off out of the province.
Between Feb.4 2010 and NOW I have had to call the police on my daughters father 65 times, for harrasment, uttering threats, damaging property and trying to run me off the road in a vehicle.. while my child was in the car….
I dont know if it is clear to you people on what kind of guy I am dealing with, however through my eyes and my familys eyes he is a very dangerous person and the court is just going to allow him to have access to this poor innocent child who doesnt know any better and is not able to come home and tell me how it went. I am having a very hard time dealing with this and I am beginning to get very stressed, I am having anxiety and I think maybe a little bit of depression. Any suggestions on what I should do?

Please only helpful things, I am not looking to be judged and or criticized!
I HAVE A RESTRAINING ORDER
I WAS WITH HIM FOR 3 YEARS BEFORE GETTING [REGNANT AND DID NOT KNOW THESE THINGS ABOUT HIM
I HAVE EVERYTIME I CALLED THE POLICE DOCUMENTED AND I ALSO HAVE ALL THE POLICE DOCUMENTATIONS FROM THE HEAD QUARTERS IN OTTAWA ONTARIO…

NONE OF THIS SEEMS TO MATTER…. HE IS U AND NOBODY CAN SEEM TO SEE IT… AND YOU PEOPLE WHO CAN SEE IT DONT THINK IM TELLING THE TRUTH?

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What do you do to cope with life?

  • Posted on December 31, 2010 at 3:22 am

Hey bartender, make me another drink
Trying to drown my sorrows, make ‘em sink
Braking my parole so I can have a good time
Hope I don’t get caught, I’ll serve another dime
Got home at five, smelling like I drunk too much
Passed out on the porch, after I threw up my lunch
Beer cans surround me, feeling dehydrated
Thanks to my dad, I’m the man he created
He drank so much that he left my mother
With two children, his daughter with her brother
Talking to the bartender again, maybe he’ll listen
Drinking so I fill whatever in my life is miss’n
Maybe what I need is love, I’ll probably never learn
Pour gasoline on it while I watch it all burn
Waiting for the cops to come and pick me up
Hate this life I’m living, I’ve just had enough

Watched my life go up in flames
Now I’m doing drinking games
Can’t believe it, I’m an alcoholic
I think my level is one point six

Life had been nothing but udder torture
Once a genius, now I’m looking at a failure
Too many heartbreaks got me sitting at a bar
Knowing what I’m doing won’t get me far
Just sick and tired of what is going on
Wake up every other morning on the lawn
Drinking too much gonna give me liver cancer
Knowing what I’m doing will never be the answer
Need to move and get rid of this hangover
Maybe need to quit drinking and get sober
Probably not since life offers no other relief
I need to get rid of this life, take off the heat
So while intoxicated I got in the car, stumbling
Started the ignition my stomach still rumbling
Hitting over 100 running red light on the highway
Going to the next bar, next time I’ll try to stay

Watched my life go up in flames
Now I’m doing drinking games
Can’t believe it, I’m an alcoholic
I think my level is one point six

The Midwest Arsonist

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How One Can Cope With Baby Blues

  • Posted on January 25, 2010 at 2:21 pm

Postpartum depression, or peripartum depresion occurs after a woman gives birth. Within a few hours of giving birth the amount of the two female hormones, estrogen and progesterone, return to their pre pregnancy levels. Many researchers feel that this drop in hormone levels, much like the smaller changes in hormone levels can affect a womans mood just before her menstrual cycle, is one of the causes of postpartum depression.

In some women the levels of thyroid hormones decrease as well. This decrease in these hormones can lead to symptoms of depression too. Some of these symptoms include a depressed mood, a loss of interest in daily things, problems sleeping and fatigue, irritability and weight gain.

Another factor that can lead to postpartum depression is genetics. This type of depression can be passed down from mother to daughter. There is also a correlation between postpartum depression and women who suffer from severe premenstrual syndrome.

Postpartum depsression is also known as the baby blues and one in ten new mothers suffer from this to one degree or another. In addition to the drastic changes in hormone levels, the presence of a new baby in the house is also a major factor in postpartum depression. A new baby can be a major stress on a new mom and this can factor into becoming depressed. Some of these factors include:

Having less free time then before the baby was born and an inability to control the time needed to get things done. The baby demands all the mothers attention, leaving little time for herself.

Going through labor is extremely stressful and tiring for a new mom. A new mom does not have time to regain her strength post delivery because of the demands and needs of the new baby. Just getting a good nights sleep is nearly impossible with late night feedings and diaper changes.

Many new mothers question their own ability to be a good mom. They become overwhelmed with the care the new baby needs and start to worry that they aren’t providing the care their baby needs.

For new moms, postpartum depression can occur with a feeling that they are no longer who they used to be. Their old schedule and ways of doing things have been replaced by the needs of their new baby. They can also feel like they have to do it all and try to take care of the new baby while doing all the things they used to do. This can be very overwhelming because chances are the care of the new baby will not allow them to accomplish all that they think they should.

New moms can also become disconnected from their partner and family. They find that their time is limited and they just don’t have time to spend with the rest of their family.

For most women the “baby blues” will usually go away as their hormone levels get back to normal. But for some women the depression associated with a new baby does not go away and can steadily get worse. It is very important that women who experince any kind of depression after child birth talk to their doctor right away. Most cases of postpartum depression can be dealt with with medication and some counseling.

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