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Win Back A Love Of A Lifetime

  • Posted on July 2, 2009 at 10:40 pm

Rekindling a romantic relationship from the past is quite acceptable. Remember those special moments you spent together that you wished would last, sadly all good things come to and end. You kept thinking what would have happened if the two of you were still together. But maybe they still might have feelings for you and want to take another chance with you as well.

It sounds like a plot from tragic love stories of long ago. Two star-crossed lovers who met at some point in time and sadly did not end up together simply because things did not work out right for them. They are only left with sweet memories of the good old days which they find hard to forget. Yearning to be together again and bring back the good times.

If you are at a point in time where you are alone and have failed in relationships since then, it could very well be that the one you dream of is supposed to be with you. Dont just sit around and reminisce, do something about it. If you dont know where they are now, find them. There are many things that you can do to find them. Use the resources you have available to win back a love.

Now that you found them, you might run into some issues. You need to find out if they are still available. You could send them an email saying that you were going through some stuff that brought back memories of times you had together. Ask them how they are doing and what are they up to.

Talk about your status. Don’t be too obvious about your intentions; make them think you are not that interested. Let them be if they are in a good relationship. Or they could be pretending. Nevertheless, find out what you can about them.

Build a relationship with them if they are still single. Get to know each other again and take things slow. Never rush into things.

After you have been corresponding for a little time, instead of asking for their phone number (if you don’t have it already), give them yours and say, Feel free to call anytime. Doing it this way takes the pressure off the situation. If they want to talk to you, you will know.

Before you know it, your friendship will blossom into something special and you start seeing each other often. There are tell tale signs if you still have feelings for each other. Give it a little time. If things turn out right then there is a possibility that you can get back together.

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Article Source: Win Back A Love Of A Lifetime

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Top 5 Strategies – How to Communicate With Your Children’s Other Parent

  • Posted on July 2, 2009 at 10:39 pm

I heard a journalist say recently that “there’s a vicious and respect less way of communicating that’s reserved exclusively for the ‘divorced with children’”. Ouch, that hurt! Probably because it’s so true. It doesn’t have to be like that and for the sake of building a bridge with our children’s other parent here are some ground-rules for practicing how to play fare. (For the sake of ease here, I’m going to assume that we’re talking about divorce or separation and that the children have residence with their mum; their dad having moved to a separate home).

1. Focus on the Present and the Future
Conversations between separated Mums and Dads about the past often get heated, stressed and even dangerous. Ideally, you want to get to a point where your communication is calm and actively contributes to a positive future. If you have unresolved issues relating to your past relationship, you must find a way to process these independently to your conversations with your ex. Find a good counselor, a qualified friend or family member (i.e. they know how to keep you moving forward and are not going to spend time just agreeing with you), or an anger-management therapist – whoever it is, work through your feelings about your ex-partner in a constructive and forward-focused way in your own time.

2. Focus on the Children’s Wellbeing
Remember that regardless of what you think about your child’s other parent, your child loves you both and is not a pawn. Try to encourage a good relationship with their dad after he’s moved away and build up the time your children spend with him to a level where everyone’s happy. Initially it may be that the children just want to be in familiar surroundings for the majority of the time. Encourage and equip them to talk about how they feel and be aware not to manipulate or colour their thinking. Asking what they want is a good start, however sometimes they will have to be stretched out of their comfort zone (like they may just have to go and spend the weekend at Dad’s flat) for the long-term benefit of all their relationships.

3. Give Yourself a Time Limit for Conversations
If you find that your tolerance level for being civil to your ex-partner is limited, then make sure you only talk in short blocks of time. Practice, ‘doing diaries’ in under 10 minutes. If you feel yourself start to get anxious, then suggest that ‘we look at this again next week’.

4. Get Comfortable With Not Concluding
Not all conversations about our children have to be concluded right now. Try to plan ahead when negotiating access, holidays, saving for gifts, having your children be at their friend’s parties, etc. Mention ahead of time that you’d like to take the children to Cornwall, or you want to have them visit their Granny on her birthday. This will allow time for both parties to consider the benefits for the children and to consider what a compromise or re-negotiation might look like.

5. Be Respectful
Challenging though it might be, talking to your ex with respect is the best way to begin to change things for the better. I know how hard this can be – especially in the early days; but it will get easier with practice and persistence. You owe it to yourself and to your children and ultimately it will reduce anxiety and increase happiness all round.

Jennifer Broadley is a qualified executive coach and the founder of www.SuccessfulSingleParenting.com
For more information and a FR*EE Special Report “ The 5 Secrets for Successful Single Parenting” visit: www.SuccessfulSingleParenting.com

Article Source: Top 5 Strategies – How to Communicate With Your Children’s Other Parent

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