You are currently browsing all posts tagged with 'guilt'

Should I allow my daughter to play on my guilt?

  • Posted on February 18, 2011 at 2:17 pm

I am a recovering alcoholic. I lost custody of my 13 year old daughter to her father when she was 3, but have had visitations since. I got sober a year ago and am doing much better, but I am a single mom to a 10 year old also, and don’t have very much money. My ex husband does not ask for child support so I don’t pay it. My issue is this. My daughter wants a christmas present that cost 150.00 dollars. I can get this for her but then I will be behind. She gets mad if I tell her I might have to get her something less expensive. Every night when we talk on the phone she says “Mom, are you gonna be able to get me what I want or not?” I’m not sure what to do. Should I get it for her and suffer, or get her something less expensive and deal with her anger. Help!!!

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Buddhist Meditation Cd

  • Posted on July 1, 2009 at 10:12 pm

A guided thoughtfulness CD is a zealous route to fine-tune your psyche and make appearance amidst the pressures of life. Life keep be taxing especially if you are dealings with numerous hard things much as challenges at work, house problems, or relation issues. By meditating, you present your psyche a try to relaxation and you rent your brain know over for a some moments.

The mind is the sepulcher of every our emotions, thoughts, and aspirations. It lies sound into the tunnels of our being, directive our actions and thoughts without us consciously knowledgeable nearly it. If you utilize into your subconscious, you release a wealth of emotions which keep possess a antiseptic belief on you. It purges you of guilt, anger, resentment, crankiness, boredom, and separate harmful feelings. You see, conscionable suchlike the body, our deal needs regular conditioning to detain in pass shape.

And hearing to a guided meditation CD stool do conscionable that. When you focus to it, you are transported to a estimate and case where there is example and heartsease every around you, and where there are no demands or expectations. You go finished a activity of relieving yourself the surplus luggage that you carry. You provide yourself to be unity with nature and the unhearable rhythms of the universe.

This noesis gradually relaxes every the nerves in your body, as if someone category and regnant is effort and healing every the unhealthy symptom of your being. You get experience to respire deeply and as the beam fills your lungs, you search every azygos tension melt same vapor. You comprehend so light, so quiet and composed, and you undergo same you terminate rest here forever.

And when you eventually cookie reveal of trance endorse into the realistic world, you think a renewed judgement of force and vitality. It’s similar you were regenerate and that you crapper approach some drubbing living throws at you. You know this untested saved cause to handgrip the ticklish realities of beingness a hominine and you arise as a victor. You mate that as a hominian being, you bed a square in the humanity and you keep function as enthusiastic as some added mathematician that has e_er walked the planet.

Going finished a nonbelligerent reflection is a valuable possibility to neaten your mind, soul, and spirit.

http://www.zenmonk.co.cc

Article Source: Buddhist Meditation Cd

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The Truth About Anticipating Grief

  • Posted on July 1, 2009 at 7:36 pm

The thought and feeling that our loved one is going to die is never a consoling fact. Hence, anticipating grief is not an easy thing to do for everyone else involved. Anticipating grief is the period during which a family member or a patient is expected to die. This sorrow is somewhat the same to the after-effects of losing someone you love. The emotions felt are the same feeling of loss and it just hurts as bad. It is no less different than when one has gone through a sudden or tragic death of a loved one. It comes with some of the similar emotions of shock, denial and guilt and is related with social and cultural reactions regarding the loss.

And because some people are still in a state of denial they may not go through anticipatory grief. Their grief will happen after the loss of their beloved. The grief experienced before the demise doesn’t shorten the grief after the demise. It’s still the same sorrowful grieving process and it does not make any better way to endure. The only distinction between anticipating grief and coping with a sudden loss is that it gives the entire clan some time to talk and spend the remaining time with the person as well as accepting and coming to terms in the reality of their demise.

There is still time left to talk about things that were kept as secrets. There is still time left to make any amends to the existing relationships. There is still time left to finally forgive any faults or mistakes in the past. And there is till time left to hear and carry out the last dying wishes of a parting loved one. This grief in anticipating the demise of someone we love builds a great concern for the dying person, painful and sorrowful preparation of the departure of the loved one, and making the necessary adjustments in living without our dearest beloved.

When somebody dies suddenly and so tragically, the pain that goes with it could be more overwhelming than that of anticipatory grief because of the shock and trauma. There is not even a warning signal or no more time left to reminisce the past with the person. This puts the bereaved in a corner to confront the unexpected which could minimize the coping capacities of that person and make normalcy seem so far away. The impact of that great loss might be hard to imagine and may not be realized right away. Thus, acceptance seems barely discernible. Learning to accept the possibility of the passing of a loved one would leave you feeling that you are slowly abandoning that person.

Expecting the death might only build more emotional attachment to the dying person even stronger which doesn’t make it any way easier to accept the future. The dying person on the other hand also undergoes pain for leaving everyone and makes it more painful and unbearable for everybody involved. No matter how our loved one dies, it all depends on each person and how much they cope with grief in their lives.

The author of this article Amy Twain is a Self Improvement Coach who has been successfully coaching and guiding clients for many years. Amy just published a new home study course on how to boost your Self Esteem overnight. More info about this “Quick-Action Plan for A More Confident You” is available at http://www.FabulousSelfEsteem.com.

Article Source: The Truth About Anticipating Grief

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Grief ~ a way to remember that feels good

  • Posted on July 1, 2009 at 6:41 pm

It was the 2nd anniversary of my mother’s passing and who knows what prompted me to write this, other than to pass on some thoughts. (Or maybe just some personal ramblings)

There’s a line in a song
‘ you left me here, to remind me of you’ and that to me is a comfort
~ as long as I am here, so will she.

and hopefully I can display those wonderful qualities she taught me by the way she was and the way she still is within me.

We don’t have to be sad, angry or alone when we remember those who have left us ~ I’m not ~ I miss her and speak to her most days and listen. Not just with my ears but with an awareness and I seem to understand.
But how can you remember in a way that makes you feel ok?

I feel I am lucky to have found NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) way back when I did. It has taught me to know I can experience memories how I want to experience them. I can remember times which before would bring on a negative emotion such as anger, sadness, guilt etc. but now they are just something that happened in my past and are void of those old feelings. Just as importantly I can re-experience the feelings of any good memory, in my mind I am there again and even better that that if I want I can magnify those good feelings and take them with me into my present-my now. In our trainings (my sons’ and mine) and my therapy work it’s great to see others find how much fun you can have learning and doing this and how it truly transforms their future.

Any way, back to that line of the song and one of the simple ways to remember that special someone.

This is what I do.
I think of a good time(s) with her and see it as if I’m looking through my own eyes.
I’m there again, seeing what I saw, hearing what I heard and I feel the good feelings I had and every good memory is the same way. I make it that way because that’s how I want it to be.

If any memory isn’t of a good time, I see it differently. I see myself in the memory, (as if it’s a movie with me in it) over there and I make it smaller and darker, I make it still and move it away from me ~ any not so good feeling just diminish

I also have noticed that a side effect of seeing, hearing and feeling those good memories is that you notice even more good things about that person. Things that you see, maybe a book they read or a photograph brings even more good feelings and sometimes a feeling of gratefulness that you had that person in your life. Now I can talk about my mother (and to her) with nothing other than love and good feelings – no tears just joy.
This is not the only way but a sure way to remember what you want, how you want to and it’s good to remember because……………..

‘ you left me here, to remind me of you’

Enjoy your every heart beat

Paul

Paul Clough is a trainer of NLP and Hypnosis, Master Practitioner of Time Line Therapy with his youngest son Joseph Clough. A practicing therapist and coach ~ Someone who talks the talk AND walks the walk. .For more information call +44(0)1223 720 120 or to see free hypnosis and NLP learning videos and audio downloads

Article Source: Grief ~ a way to remember that feels good

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