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My kids are REALLY out of control !! PLEASE HELP !!!?

  • Posted on January 6, 2011 at 1:21 pm

I have two teenage kids, a son 16 and a daughter 17. Their mother dies 8 years ago and ever since then they get worse and worse. My son is dating a 19 year old girl who i do not approve of. Hes talking about adopting her 1 year old son when he turns 18 and is talking about having a baby with her. Hes also been skipping school and the other day I found empty bottles of alcohol in his room.

But he is nothing compared to my daughter. She goes out with a different guy every night. I found homemade pornography in her room where she was engaging in sexual intercourse with 2 other people. I found heroin in her closet. Shes failing all her classes and talking about dropping out of school. Ive found empty pregnancy test boxes in her room and much much more.

Ive tried everything grounding them, taking things away from them, sending them to their grandparents for weeks at a time, and everything i can think of.

What more can I do ?

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My best friend is dating a drug dealer, and they have kids in the house. What do I do?

  • Posted on December 29, 2010 at 7:22 am

She has a daughter that lives in the house. He sells heroin and their roommate sells cocaine. He’s been to jail before, came out, was good for a while, and now is selling again. He also uses. She is in a world of pain, everyone that cares about her (ie, family and REAL friends) want to help her, but she just won’t leave. She falls for his lies … he’ll change, it’s only temporary, he’ll stop drinking and using, he’ll get a job. JUST as she was ready to leave, he switched it up on her. Now she’s finding it hard to go because she sees “small improvements”. I’m contemplating ending the friendship because it is causing ME sleepless nights and I can’t stand the thought of the police kicking down the door. She gets defensive when I say something to her and at this point is telling me to mind my own business basically, and that it’s her decision. I’ve helped her more than anyone ever, and it’s killing me to watch her spiral out of control like this. Friends and family have tried to have a mini intervention. I know that you can’t someone who doesn’t want help, but what is the point of continuing this friendship? I am on the fence because I feel like this is when she needs me the most, when she’s down like this. But do I let her bring me down in the process? Or do I just come back to her after she’s fallen flat on her face and help her pick up the pieces?

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My friend who has 2 kids is back into meth again?

  • Posted on December 16, 2010 at 7:20 am

What can I do to help her? I do not even go over to her house anymore and I have not seen her latley but I heard from her sister she was back into meth again. We both did it a few years alot and got into it. I got out of it because I moved away, had a baby. Have not done it since because I want to be their for my daughter and set a good example. She does not have a very supportive family, its chaos with them right now. And I am sure she is not associating with good people. Is their anything I really can do?
How is calling CPS on her going to help anything? I have no proof the children are being abused. Just word of mouth that she is back into drugs bad. I think they have already come their twice because people are trying to get her in trouble for stupid things. One person who called was a ex boyfriend who was mad she dumped him. The other was this ex friend who was trying to get back at her. I am see where you are coming from but how much better would it be for the kids to be in foster homes? I am looking for a better alternative
Two different Dad’s. One I have no idea where or how to get a hold of him and the other comes around and is not a drug user. But I have no way of getting a hold of him either. Like I said I do not go over to her house or visit her.

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would you rather have your kids Drinking Beer or Smoking Meth.?

  • Posted on November 22, 2010 at 8:20 am

I asked this b/c this girl told me her health teacher said alcohol burns holes in the brian which is not true whatsoever.

And then I rememberd when a health teacher told me that alcohol is the worst drug in the world, and its the last one we should try.

So would your prefer:

Seeing you kids with a few friends drinking beer watching basketball underage acting silly.

OR

Seeing them smoking meth and twiching walking around in circles really fast.

Or even worse:

Find your son or daughter passed out drunk on a couch.

Or just find him/her in a park after being missing for 3 days were he/she hassnt slept or ate in 3 days sractching themselves as the drug wears.

Im just saying this b/c if health teachers are saying Alcohol is the worst but notice everyone uses and seems just fine then why would Meth be that bad?

So your kids drinking bud or injecting Meth?
Apperntly Meth has only a 7% recovery rate, so i guess the rest just kinda die. . .

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How Can I Get My Kids Back After Drug Addiction?

  • Posted on November 20, 2010 at 10:21 am

It’s actually a friend of mine… She did Meth and all kinds of nasty crap, and lost 2 of her children. One of the children, a daughter, was given to her Grandmother. (Guardianship) That was 9 years ago… She successfully quit all her disgusting vices, and was fine with the ways things were, because she could still see/talk to her daughter. Now the grandmother is leaving the state, and she wants her daughter back because she does not want her out of MO.

What can she do??

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My fiances kids are awful to my 17 yr old daughter and I?

  • Posted on November 10, 2010 at 1:21 pm

They lhey live in Maryland (thank god) but they go thru Daddy to say whatever stories they can make up to get to me and my daughter. I believe its because he left wen they were young due to a cocaine addiction, he didnt want them to go thru it with him so he left the kids with the mother and got himself cleaned up (19 yrs and holding) He has done everything he possibly can to make up for the lost yrs and stayed in contact with them the whole time. They visit alot and he pays for plane tickets AND whatever they want basically! When he DOES say no – which is rare, all hell breaks loose and they attack me with the worst 4 letter words they can come up with!
The daughter who is 25 has a 6yr old son who we adore, the last visit a month ago went well or at least I thought? His Grandson told me while he was here that he WANTS to call me Gma but hes not allowed to and things to that nature– As soon as they were home it was horrible! I was a F**King B**ch and on and on ?? I have no clue as to why she feels this way and it threw us all for a loop but daddy does nothing when it comes to her and NO ONE else does either. Shes LITERALLY the boss of all who know her except me! I will ask her ?s about whats going on and she hates to be “called out” on anything and Ive learned to just let it go for the sake of my fiance and I so we dont fight over it.
The son- 22 just had a baby with a married girl who has 2 other kids and lives with her husband. He is also in Maryland and will not set foot in WI since he has warrants out for his arrest. So shes Pregnant and were buying clothes, helping her with a new place to live, shes coming over for family night etc etc.. In the meantime she is goin behind our backs telling his son how horrible we are which led to my fiance disowning his son. Once again I was the MAIN person under attack?? We had to get Restraining orders, call CPS etc etc!! Horrible stuff that I just cannot understand! My fiance has NO problems putting him in his place even tho it doesnt help at all and just keeps the fire burning so weve stopped and now arent allowed to see the baby that is now 2 months old?
She had the baby took off to MD and LEFT her 2 yound kids alone with the father- HE CALLED US and we dont even know the guy– he needed diapers, food etc so we got it for him- that bit us just as hard?? Im so confused on what to do or how to handle this? Ive tried everything and it only makes it worse so Im working on accepting it all and letting it go however in the meantime his daughter is saying awful things about me and my daughter and he does nothing? The resentments are growing due to this but he tells me its between me and his daughter?? I strongly DISAGREE and I do think he has some control to make this nonsense stop. These 2 still live with their bipolar alcoholic mom, and both of them are as well addicted to everything and also have bipolar, depression and anxiety!!
I feel awful for the 6yr old living in those conditions but nothing can be done? The baby lives 10 min away from us yet we arent allowed to see him or even talk to her – once in awhile she will email to ask if we wood come see the baby and the fiance says NO! I dont blame him one bit with all thats happened yet I want a part in the babys life since we are the only somewhat of a “normal” family- Im not at all saying we are perfect, we are the average family! Much more has happened and has been said but itd be a novel to write, All I can say is any negative talk or actions have been on them and I havent spoken to any of them thru this whole thing except for his daughter ONCE!! Anyone going thru anything similiar or have any suggestions so I can at least sleep at night. I worry about my daughter as well as she has been greatly affected too, shes my #1 priority and anything that happens I do my BEST to keep her from knowing ! This is a tough one to write but Im hoping someone out there will understand my SHORT version of this whole mess??
Thanks
Not sure why you would tell me to keep my legs closed? I have ONE daughter who is 17 and in high school – shes also a very respectful smart beautiful girl. Im talking about my FIANCES KIDS and their situations

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My kids are addicts, serious answers only…?

  • Posted on November 8, 2010 at 9:21 pm

My daughter is a heroin addict and my son has depression problems and just gave his notice at work to go into treatment. He’s also a former “cutter”. I’m about at my wits end trying to deal with all of this. I’ve done everything but get on my knees and beg my daughter to go into detox/treatment, I’ve tried tough love, kindness and nothing works. My son lives at home and I’m worrying about what he’ll do about a job after he does treatment because he was working close to home, got paid pretty well and I see him depleting his savings to live on. I know that should be the last thing to worry about but I do. Do all parents blame themselves for their children’s problems? Are there any others out there? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I feel so helpless.
Thanks to all of you for your serious answers, except boot camp boy. My son went to the Stress Unit and we found out his Seroquel (sp?) had been reduced, doctor increased it and he’s coming home tomorrow. I want to give you all a best answer (except boot camp boy) so this is going to be tough. I appreciate so much your thoughtful responses (exept boot camp boy)
Forgot to mention daughter is still using, if you pray, please keep her in your prayers. I fear that dreaded phone call of an overdose. Once again, thanks for your advice. When it happens to your family, you think this only happens on tv and then you realize you’re not alone.

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my husband drinks every night and he drives drunk we have 2 kids, what do I do?

  • Posted on October 21, 2010 at 1:22 pm

Ok. My husband and I have been married for 3 years. I have a daughter that is 7 (she is actually not his daughter, but he is all that she knows..She calls him daddy). And we have a 2 year old daughter. I have been a stay at home mom for 2 years now. Before we got married I bought a house and car, because I had a good job! Actually it was a wonderful job with GREAT pay! My husband started drinking every night and he would drive home from work drunk and it is like an hour drive, When he comes home he goes out side and smokes and drinks all night. He does not pay any attention to me or the kids? I have found him passed-out, outside a couple times. Or he passes out down stairs and he will not even sleep in the same bed as me! And when i try to talk to him he gets so mad at me and blames me for everything! I mean everything is always my fault. I thought that I could be cool with the drinking but now I feel emotionally drained and physically drained! I am not sure what to do because I am so scared of starting over with nothing! Because everything that I did have before is gone!!!!
I have tried talking to him about this and he acts like he will change but then the nest night he comes home drunk! Like hardly walking drunk!

He drank before we got married but it was NOT everynight? I LOVE HIM and I have tried the 6 month thing but it did not work. And he has been in a car accident and he left…so we had to pay an attorney $$$$$$ for his stupidness! Maybe I just feel like I cant do it without him, I don’t know?
How do I help him if does not think he has a problem? I want to run away but I can not leave him for some reason and I know it is because I want to help him..But is that a healthy thing to do to my kids?

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Are there less “obvious” alternatives to training bras? My daugher is 10 and doesn’t want other kids to know.

  • Posted on October 14, 2010 at 1:24 am

My newest challenge is trying to get my daughter (normal height, weight) to wear a bra.

She has developed into a AA cup seemingly overnight – when she returns to school in a few weeks, this will be evident.

I think a training bra or spandex undershirt will help flatten her chest down a bit, but if I say the word BRA my daughter cries and takes off.

How can I help her through this time & minimize her embarrassment at having developed “early”?

Are there less-obvious alternatives to “training bras”?
My daughter is convinced that if the other kids see any kind of strap-marks through her t-shirts that she will be ridiculed! Having developed early myself, I know this to be true, but what are my alternatives? (brand, style)?

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Are there less “obvious” alternatives to training bras? My daugher is 10 and doesn’t want other kids to know.

  • Posted on October 13, 2010 at 4:28 am

My newest challenge is trying to get my daughter (normal height, weight) to wear a bra.

She has developed into a AA cup seemingly overnight – when she returns to school in a few weeks, this will be evident.

I think a training bra or spandex undershirt will help flatten her chest down a bit, but if I say the word BRA my daughter cries and takes off.

How can I help her through this time & minimize her embarrassment at having developed “early”?

Are there less-obvious alternatives to “training bras”?
My daughter is convinced that if the other kids see any kind of strap-marks through her t-shirts that she will be ridiculed! Having developed early myself, I know this to be true, but what are my alternatives? (brand, style)?

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