I was married to my ex for 20 years. He gave me a life of disappointments, problems, alcoholism and drug abuse. He cleaned up after 13 years of marriage, but he remained the same irresponsible and immature man as ever, except now he was sober. Long story short, he was never there for my kids or me and as soon as the kids graduated, I divorced him. I loved him so very much, but who he was, I did not want and although I loved him with all my heart, I love me more.
It is now almost three years later and I have moved on, am engaged and happy. No more stress, problems or rescuing. I still am the only one the kids can depend on, and where is he? He partied and went back to drinking the moment I left. My son chose to move in with his father after he graduated (bcuz I have rules) and had freedom beyond belief as his dad partied the nights, weeks, months away. After a series of mishaps, they had to move from where they are and my ex did not bother to talk to my son, he chose to move on in with his current gf. Who may that be? Well, his ex sister-in law.
My ex had a child before we married. His ex has a sister who is 12 years younger than he and also married with 3 children, ages 2 years, 9 years and 12 years. When this woman’s husband found out his wife was having an affair, he kicked her out, kept the children and now my ex and she are moving in together. My son is devastated at his father’s lack of respect. His dad says “they didn;t plan it this way, it just happened”. BS! To see a married woman, you have to plan around her husband! He sees nothing wrong with it…
I am disappointed and cannot stop thinking about this. My ex is a poor budgeter and has no money for an apartment, so he is renting a room in someone’s house w/ this woman. My ex asked me to wish him well, and I told him I would not do that. THe only thing I wish for him is to recuperate his relationship with my kids. My son (19 yrs.)moved in with some roommates, but always has my support, as does my daughter (21 yrs.).
I am so angry that I cannot stop thinking about this. I don’t know if it is because I did not want him to move on or because of who he is doing it with or because of the pain he caused us and he doesn;t deserve to be happy! THere are moments I want to cry and moments I hurt and moments that I know how much I don;t love him anymore. But it still hurts to see that in the end, he still is not there for his family because everyone else still comes first…
In the end, he started to cry and tell me he continues to miss me everyday and still loves me very much. Says no one will ever take my place and said he loves her, but it is not the same.
I am so disappointed in his choices in life. Although in the beginning he denied what he is doing with this woman is wrong, he admitted in the end that he knows it IS wrong, but, “Oh well”.