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Should I allow my daughter to play on my guilt?

  • Posted on February 18, 2011 at 2:17 pm

I am a recovering alcoholic. I lost custody of my 13 year old daughter to her father when she was 3, but have had visitations since. I got sober a year ago and am doing much better, but I am a single mom to a 10 year old also, and don’t have very much money. My ex husband does not ask for child support so I don’t pay it. My issue is this. My daughter wants a christmas present that cost 150.00 dollars. I can get this for her but then I will be behind. She gets mad if I tell her I might have to get her something less expensive. Every night when we talk on the phone she says “Mom, are you gonna be able to get me what I want or not?” I’m not sure what to do. Should I get it for her and suffer, or get her something less expensive and deal with her anger. Help!!!

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Play date at a recovering addict’s house?

  • Posted on December 24, 2010 at 5:21 pm

I moved to a small town a couple years ago. The kind of town where most people grew up knowing everyone their whole lives. But me I’m still new I dont know everyone.

I am told that my daughter’s friend, his mother is a recoving heroin addict. This is okay with me, as long as she’s in recovery of course. The mother is a real spaceshot. My daughter and her friend are 6.

Usually play dates are here because Gina’s takes insulin. Gina went to their house to play for the first time. When I picked her up the mother was more airhead-y than usual. She had a t-shirt on and a mark on the inside of her arm (one arm, not both). Where the bend in your arm is, on the inside. I don’t know if it was from needle use. I know nothing about heroin. I thought it made you tired and your words slurry. Can it make you a space shot? What kind of mark you ask? It was brownish red line. I don’t really know, I didn’t have my glasses on. I’m aware that before I picked my daughter up the mother was picking flowers in the yard with the kids, looking for crickets with them and they went for a short walk to the store. Mother stuff… it seems to me that an active user wouldn’t do these things.

What’s your take on this? I can move playdates back to my house for now but at some point I’m going to have to deal with this again. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt, but at the same time I can’t let my daughter go over there until I’m sure. What does your gut say based on this post?

Scars. Never thought of that. They scar? I feel better already. I really don’t think she’s using.

Well sure Lyz, I’d give her the benefit of the doubt. Why wouldn’t I? That doesn’t make me naiive or put her ahead of my daughter. You’re right, my daughter is absolutely the most important thing. That doesn’t mean I should go on a crusade. If this woman is active of course there wont be any more visits. But I think I should confirm that first, don’t you?

Still a helpful answer, so no downthumb for you. A post is most useful when there is a variety of opinions.

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Does anyone play Brickbreaker on their Blackberry? If so, what level have you gotten to?

  • Posted on October 11, 2010 at 10:22 am

My wife, daughter, and I are addicted to it, and I recently got the level 29!!!!! No joke, toughest levels are 16 and 17, after that they seemed to easier.

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Does this story im doing for my drama play sound realistic?

  • Posted on October 8, 2010 at 5:22 pm

Like does it sound like it would happen in real life:

A group of friends are drunk and they start driving, a daughter and her mum are about to cross the road and the mum pushes her daughter away to save her from getting run over. The mum gets run over instead and the daughter wants to get revenge on the people and follows them home and kills them.

Thats just brief, thanks for your answers x

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How should I play my cards in this situation to win my ex back?

  • Posted on October 8, 2010 at 12:18 pm

I am newly divorced (it was final in March). It was due in part to my binge drinking and in part to her passive aggressive personality. I was the one who filed for the divorce and we never really tried counseling or anything like that.

I have since gotten help and quit drinking and have started to improve myself. My ex also realizes she has a passive aggressive personality and is trying to correct it. We have been seeing each other about once every 2 weeks for the past few months and I know that I still love her and that I want her back.

I see genuine happiness in her when we are together, but when I asked about reforming a relationship she got nervous and said she still loves me and still has feelings for me but she doesn’t know and she would let me know if she decides that there is no hope for us, but she doesn’t want to lead me on either and she thinks we should both see other people in addition to seeing one another although she only wants to get together once every 2 weeks. She moved 1 month ago and there is a guy next door who she seems to have some interest in but she has told me that I am “much better looking than he is”. She says she wants to just be friends for now, although we are having sex so to me that fits the definition of an open relationship. And lastly she has said she’s not ready for couples counseling because that would be a commitment that she is willing to try to make it work and she’s still not sure?

What should I do- how should I be handling this? We have a 2 yr old daughter together as well who lives with each of us 1/2 of the time. My thoughts are consumed with her 24×7 and this is killing me, although I am doing as best I can to play it cool with her and respect the every 2 week thing. I have seen the other guy and he’s not a high quality guy he is a rebound guy so I don’t think it will work out between her and him anyway but she says their just friends even though they have kissed in the garage a week ago.

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Is it wrong to tell my husband I don’t want him to play in a band with a heroin addict?

  • Posted on September 11, 2010 at 5:23 am

The heroin addict in question is an old friend of both of ours. He has a habit of getting dangerously addicted to drugs and spending time in and out of rehab. I have been emotionally supportive for this guy multiple times, for almost 8 years!He swears he’s going to get better, he fails. Now he tells my husband recently that he’s tried heroin but only once or something. I have seen him recently sitting on the ground by the bus stop looking like he was tripping out and rocking back and forth on the ground! I told my husband that our child’s safety should be our biggest concern, not playing in a band. I told him I didn’t want this guy at our house and he had him over anyways(x2)! We have a six year old daughter!! I don’t want my child exposed to a heroin addict! So anyways the band is made up of like all of my husband’s friends and I told him I don’t want him going anymore. I told him go ahead tell them it’s my fault I don’t care. He hasn’t been going since I told him I was furious and I will not have it, but I think he’s actually blaming me for being the problem. I feel really bad that he may feel this way.. I was just looking out for the welfare of our family. I also want to add that he would always end up driving this guy to band practice and back and I didn’t want drugs in our car! Yahoo users was this wrong of me to do????

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help, I can’t let my daughter play with her Play Doh, because I’m addicted to its smell…?

  • Posted on August 27, 2010 at 6:19 pm

We bought play doh for my daughter for christmas this year, and it was the first time I had seen it since I was about 8 years old. Now I can’t give it back to her because it smells so damned good. Anyone else have this problem? lol

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What is a great song to play for my Dad at his wedding?

  • Posted on August 23, 2010 at 9:24 pm

My folks are renewing their vows, and I have a great song picked out for my mother, but I cannot think of any songs for my dad. (If it makes a difference, he has all daughters).
THANKS!!!

EDIT:

I am looking for a song about father’s or father and daughter’s where the Dad is the heroin of the song.

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