Social service is a profession.
Dalip Singh Wasan, Advocate.
When I was crossing twenty five, my parents were having worries about my marriage and as per their wisdom and as per their position in the society, they found a match for me. The man was about ten years more than of my age and I had been told that his earlier wife had committed suicide. The facts were not fully known to my parents, but since the man was having a house and was also having a small shop, they convinced me that he shall be providing boarding and lodging to me and this is the ultimate goal prescribed here in India and both parents and the bride are happy that they could find out a match who can bring some income in the house.
I could not consult my friends, because most of my friends had been married and they were not telling me good stories about their married life. The main problems were that the income of the husband was on lower side, he was a drug addict, he was indulging in gambling, he was a drunkard, he was having relations with other women and the like. All these facts were disturbing and therefore, I had calculated that this is the ultimate fate of each of us and therefore, when others are bearing all these difficulties and are still living with their husbands, I too can venture and I actually went to the new house without having any pleasure, any happiness and without having any hopes in my mind.
The first night was nothing more than the sex and I also participated in that course because here in our area this had been the ultimate goal of marriage. I had noted that the man had not prepared himself for the occasion and it had been a simple ceremony. He had been with his friends and when he entered my room, he was fully drunk and took me in his arms and started kissing me here and there and embracing me tightly. Since this was the first time I could have kisses from a man, I enjoyed and placed myself before this man who could utilize me as per his own discretions.
In the morning he again took one or two pegs and was having hungry eyes on my face and on all my rounds and horizons. His sister had been here and when this ceremony ended, she left for her own house and thus we two were left all alone. And this man started living with me and I noticed that the only aim in his life was sex and therefore, as and when he could get time, he took me in his arms, started kissing me and then having his final satisfaction without caring for my participation. I took this all as my fate and started living with the man.
In due course he had started calling his friends to the house to have a face seeing ceremony. All were having praise for my beauty and were telling to my husband that he had been a lucky person who could get such a beautiful girl and they were also telling him that the girl is too young and he was at least ten twelve years older than me. He was having all love with me in their presence and listening praise, he came in motion and took me to the inner room and came out after having sex with me. The friends sitting there had been watching all that and thus one of two started visiting my house when my husband had been out. They talked about my husband and sometime they brought some eatables for me. And I noticed they started touching my body and they started kissing me. I could not raise alarm because I was afraid of my husband. When they left me, they gave me some money and when I handed over this money to my husband, he did not raise objections. I due course I realized that all these visits were preplanned and I had been informed that my husband had been collecting money from them before he allowed them to visit the house.
I had been enjoying my life for some days, but when I talked all this to my mother, she was disturbed and told me that I should not become a prostitute. An Indian woman should not have sex beyond the husband because it is a sin, it is a crime and it is a misconduct. I promised that I would not allow others to have approach to my body and when some one approached me, I came out of the house and started calling other women from the neighbourhood to help me. I noted that one lady had started taking much interest in me. I came to know that she was a social worker. She had started coming to me house and she had been sitting with me for hours together. She took me to the women cell established in the city by the state to help those ladies who are in trouble. I was not ready to lodge a complaint against my husband, because I was having a fear in my mind that my husband shall shunt out me and I had left the house of my parents and that house was not open for me now. I was trying to adjust myself under these changed circumstances. But this lady was not happy with me. She wanted that I should lodge a complaint against my husband and I should name the people who had been utilizing me with the consent of my husband or without his consent. She also desired that I should tell the police that my husband had started earning from his friends and other customers who had been sent to me and who had sex with me.
When I refused to lodge a complaint against my husband, this lady was not happy and then she herself started bringing at least one man with her and she allowed him to have all with me and that too in her absence. She started threatening me that if I raise an alarm, she would tell the people that she herself had called this man and had put her as guard till the course ended.
I went to my parents time and again, but I was not telling what had been happening with me. I told them that all is well at her house. I had been raising objections before my husband, but he usually said, “ I am not earning much. If you have started earning and helping me, it is good and this body is vanish-able and if some people enjoy this body and make payment, it is not good. You are giving them something in charity and this charity concept is very old in India and when we give our body in charity, this is the supreme charity.” This was the life philosophy of my man who had been appointed as my husband by my parents. My parents knew all this but they were not interfering and thus the process continued till that date the people could enjoy my body. And ultimately they left and I noticed that I had to face hard days. I was talking to my mother, “ Mother those were good days when I had been earning and had been running the family administration. Now I have stopped earning and therefore, I am starving and my husband who is al old man is also starving.” My mother was too old and therefore, she could not listen what I had said to her and she put her right hand on my head and said, “ My daughter you are great. I have full hope in you and I shall see that you shall start earning once again”. The social worker had been coming to me and was desiring that I should accommodate some old men and they shall give more money than the young people and they would not be utilizing my body as the young people had been utilizing. I shall remain fresh.” I was surprised to note that this old social service lady was still in the line in this old age. One day I asked, “ Dear aunt, you should leave this line now. Much had been done by you. Now you should have some devotion towards God.” And a very simple reply was from her side, “I have got no source of income and if I stop this work, I shall die of hunger. This work is going on because the old people are also interested in having change and I find out subjects which could give them a change.”
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