Every teen considers his or her parent to be a bit of a psycho. But because I can’t find any old posts that relate, tell me this: are these signs of an extremely abnormal (PSYCHO) level of my mom “caring,” or are they justifiable as normal?
Background info:
I’m almost 18, get good grades, take a lot of extra curricular courses, work three jobs in the summer, don’t attend “parties,” drinking/smoking/”encounters” with the opposite gender are few and far apart occasions, although I tend to miss my ‘curfew’ I always make sure I come home safely if I end up going out late. I try very hard to not raise my voice at my mom. Compared to a lot of people my age, I’d like to think I’m doing pretty well as a teenager.
My sibling, who is almost 19, is the total opposite, piercings and tattoos, parties and men 3 nights a week, never comes home, etc etc. You should know the kind of stereotype.
My mom is a single parent. No boyfriends. No alcoholism (which are the two main characteristics that I’ve been seeing in Yahoo Answers). Very few friends. Never goes out.
Okay. Here is how I am treated:
She criticizes and scorns everything I do…right down to the way I sign my name, speak to others, or even the way I smile.
She cuts off my entire wireless phone account sometimes when I talk to people too late at night (Yep, she tries to force me to sleep at about 11. Flips OUT when I just sit quietly in my room if I’m not tired)
She looks at my phone records to see who I am talking to and when. She calls the numbers she doesn’t recognize.
Two volumes: loud, and earsplitting. I don’t remember the last time I tried to speak to her without her erupting into full out screaming at me. (And really, this isn’t a Yahoo Question where I angrily rant about “Oh I hate my mom she took away my TV rights.” I do very much wish to have a better relationship with her, but all my attempts have ended this way.)
When I come home late or upset her in a similar way, everything in arms reach gets thrown at me, I get pushed around, etc. I try very much to calm her down and reassure her that I’m okay and I’m not going to end up on the street corner (because I’m going to a good school and do well there and have ambitions) but that seems to make it worse.
She’s one of those people who shuts her ears and opens her mouth. I’ve tried talking to her, writing her letters, sending her articles, buying her coffee, having her meet my friends so she knows that I don’t hang out with sketch balls, nothing seems to work. Because I’m her irresponsible, rude, slut drug-addict liar of a daughter. (?)
When I try to talk to her about anything, even the weather, she somehow finds a way to turn it into an opportunity to basically tell me I’m shit and that I am as slimy as my father (who I clearly can not say much about) Really, I don’t know how I have managed to maintain a remotely steady level of confidence.
Anecdote:
I was at a friend’s house watching TV, and around 10 my sister texted me because she got stranded at the train station, which is about a half hour away, because she was on her way home so she would be able to attend my great aunt’s funeral. Naturally, we set out to rescue her, got lost, and took until 2AM to see her back safely. She decided to sleep at my friend’s house because she did not want to deal with my mom’s tantrums. That left me to go home with a story and no sister to show for it. Needless to say, I was a target for a typhoon of flying objects that night. Just because I was trying to make sure my own family got back to town safely.
I never got an apology.
I’m sure there’s a lot more that I forgot to say, but if you’re one of the precious few who has taken the time to read such a long question, can you please analyze the situation for me? I don’t really know what I’m looking for in an answer beyond an opinion. So, psycho, or not?
