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11 yr old has poor hygiene, soils herself and wets the bed?

  • Posted on January 1, 2011 at 1:23 am

Me and my husband are at our wits end with our 11yr old daughter.

Everyday since the age of 5 she has been wetting the bed or soiling her self while she is at school or anywhere else for that matter. she starts to smell and that is how we figure it out. when we ask her if she has gone to the bathroom in her pants she says NO. but we can clearly smell it.

She will sit in her own pee for hours without shame or even think about changing herself. It soaks through her clothes so that when she sits down she leaves wet spots. she has ruined my couches, chairs and carpets because she refuses to acknowledge or even care that she is soiled. She refuses to clean herself up. we have taught her how to do this

We find her clothes that she has hidden, in her drawers, under the bathroom sink. sometimes in the common bathroom area, in her closet but we always find it because of the smell.

We have told her time and time again that if she soils herself, she needs to stop what she is doing, clean herself up and wash her clothes out in the bathtub.

but she never does it. she would rather lie and suffer the consequences when we find the soiled clothes.

her whole room smells like dead fish. we have even removed her bed because it smelled so nasty. she is now sleeping on a futon bed that somebody gave us and she has stunk that up too.

we have tried everything. Positive reinforcement, punishments, leaving her alone, monitoring her every move, dr appts. The dr. told her to keep a journal and she refuses to do it. we got her an ultrasound on her intestines, xrays, prescriptions from the dr’s office to dry her up. The dr. has determined there is nothing physically wrong with her and has said it is a behavior issue. she does not have ADHD or Diabetes. Nothing. Just behavior issues.

we’ve cut back on her drinking liquids, first at night and that didn’t work. we’ve taken her to counseling. she is eleven years old and we bought her depends to wear to bed. I know she takes them off when we are not looking. she hides them.

I smell her room and ask her to please take the soiled clothes out and she insists there isn’t any. But we can smell them. we have to dig through her room and find them. She just lies.

she carries on as if nothing is wrong. as if she doesn’t smell. as if her room doesn’t smell. we have working noses and believe me it SMELLS.

Myy daughter is a good girl. She is a good student and all around respectable person. Hygene has always been an issue for her since a young age. I have tried with no avail to teach her proper hygene and she refuses to comply.

Please HELP ME or let me know that I’m not alone. I just don’t know what to do anymore and its so frustrating I want to run away. My 3 yr old son is perfectly potty trained and never has accidents. I just don’t understand. Is there anybody out there that I can relate to. Or anybody that can help?????

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