The first time she came home at 7:30 am after supposedly crashing at her friends house. I had a feeling there was more to it. I pressed her a little and she said that she ended up taking her friend over to her ex-boyfriends place and all she did was stay up all night talking to her ex’s boss who was visiting from out of country while her friend banged her ex. Not any more reassuring since I never met this cat. I have since and he seems to to be a stand up guy. Two months prior I expressly asked her not to go over to his apartment, so she broke that request thinking it was not founded. After this episode, we seemed to work it out over the next week ending in a big fight where I end up with all this blame for not trusting her.
So, two nights ago, it is her ex’s birthday and we both joined the party with various people most of whom I have never met. We go in separate cars since I have to get home to put her 12 year old (not his) to sleep and work early in the morning. She ends up getting wasted and not able to get home and crashes at his place again. Her last text to me was at 2:00 am saying she will be home soon.
The next morning after I dropped her daughter off at school and was headed in late to work, she finally calls and she says nothing bad happened but that she blacked out. I was just thinking that how the hell do you know what happened if you “blacked-out.” In the end, I was just concerned if she had to go on a binge drink because of something amiss between us. If our relationship was stressed from the previous all-nighter, how could she let it happen again.
I truly do not see the ex as a threat. however, you add alcohol, party favors, and an all-nighter it is hard to say what could have happened. I know we both love eachother deeply but she is trying my patience to no end. This ex is going to be in our lives forever since they are “best friends.” Already dealing with an ex-husband, visitations, getting along with her daughter, and my own ailing parents. I felt cold last night when we were together romantically – it felt forced to a degree. After re-reading this, I already know what makes sense. But my head and my heart our at opposite ends on this. It seems we have consumed eachother. When I look at her I no longer see the same person I have been in love with for over a year. Possibly…she has the same problem.
She has gone over the play by play on the first outing – the second the black out was all that was there for her to remember. She crashed on her ex’s bed and he took the couch. I am certain he is still in love with her to boot, she has always denied that but I know it to be true, thought it may be fading finally.
