Last night was sad, and unfortunately not too uncommon. (it isn’t an every day thing, but still… it happens a few times a month and I wish i could help.)
My daughter and I were sitting on the couch watching a movie. In it, a man put his life in danger to save a girl. My kid bursted out crying. I thought maybe the scene was too scary. When I tried to comfort her, she said she wished that her dad loved her that much.
He has not lived with us since 2003. He wants to, but I will not allow it. He is an alcoholic, and he has proven himself to be dangerous when he drinks. He has been to rehab, but I have still caught him drinking and been told that he makes threats behind my back. I do encourage him to see her sometimes with my supervision, but she just can’t understand and I don’t know what to do.
I tell her that her father loves her. He wants to be with us, but when he drinks beer he does not think straight. Then she asks why can’t we just take away his beer so he will be better.
Wow. Y’all have some great answers coming in! I wanted to put more details earlier but yahoo has a 1000 character limit. I am considerint therapy, but my daughter is very shy around strangers. I have tried telling her that her dad is sick, but she things that “sick” means you get better. The truth is, he doesn’t want to admit to his problems. He said the right things to get out of rehab, but he didn’t mean them.
Someone asked how violent he is… A friend of mine got hurt a few times defending me when he got mad or “playful.” He said he wanted to go to rehab so I didn’t call the cops. But then he said he could quit on his own – he didn’t. The night we officially broke up, I got a broken wrist and several smaller injuries and a policeman got broken ribs keeping my child safe. And my ex still says that he did the right thing that night! He think sthat he is the victim. My daughter did not even want to have anything to do with him for months. Now… She just wants him to express love.
